Song Parodies -> Edward Cullen
| Original Song Title: | "Heartless" |
| Original Performer: | Kanye West |
| Parody Song Title: | "Edward Cullen" |
| Parody Written by: | Mr. Washable |
This song features my friend D-Mayne
In Twilight, this guy I know
The palest skin you ever saw
All the girls still want him though
And now you know, I wanna be like Edward Cullen
I wanna be Edward Cullen
Wish I could be Edward Cullen
Wish I could be Cul-len
Wish that I could get all the girls, yo
Didn’t have to breathe, didn’t have to eat food
And of course I want to read everybodys thoughts
I wanna sparkle in the light, and drive a Volvo
And honestly I wanna play the Piano
Although it would suck to never turn 18
Cause I know pedophiles will try to rape me
I wanna say that Dracula is my homie
Be a Vegetarian even though I eat meat
Wanna say that Carlisle is my daddy
That’s such an awesome name, they’ll all be jealous of me
[Chorus]
Wish I could be in, Dr. Cullen’s
Family and the Olympic Coven
Then Edward can, be my brethren
And he can tell me how to be more like him
Jasper and Emmett are so cool also
And Alice is like Katy Perry Hot N’ Cold
Don’t wanna be near Rosalie, though
Cause I have a thing about being around a-holes
I’d run and tell Edward to leave Bella, please
It’s obvious she would much rather be with me
And if he says no, then I’ll have to agree
Cause honestly, he could beat the crap outta me
[Chorus]
Walkin, walkin, walkins dumb
Wish I could do the Edward run
Then I would be real quick too
And I could get home in time for Scooby Doo
If I was Edward, I would be
1,000,000 times hotter then he could ever be
And James would be afraid of me
I would live happily
If I could read peoples thoughts
I wanna have Edwards life
I wanna graduate a thousand times
[Chorus]
Cullen~
The palest skin you ever saw
All the girls still want him though
And now you know, I wanna be like Edward Cullen
I wanna be Edward Cullen
Wish I could be Edward Cullen
Wish I could be Cul-len
Wish that I could get all the girls, yo
Didn’t have to breathe, didn’t have to eat food
And of course I want to read everybodys thoughts
I wanna sparkle in the light, and drive a Volvo
And honestly I wanna play the Piano
Although it would suck to never turn 18
Cause I know pedophiles will try to rape me
I wanna say that Dracula is my homie
Be a Vegetarian even though I eat meat
Wanna say that Carlisle is my daddy
That’s such an awesome name, they’ll all be jealous of me
[Chorus]
Wish I could be in, Dr. Cullen’s
Family and the Olympic Coven
Then Edward can, be my brethren
And he can tell me how to be more like him
Jasper and Emmett are so cool also
And Alice is like Katy Perry Hot N’ Cold
Don’t wanna be near Rosalie, though
Cause I have a thing about being around a-holes
I’d run and tell Edward to leave Bella, please
It’s obvious she would much rather be with me
And if he says no, then I’ll have to agree
Cause honestly, he could beat the crap outta me
[Chorus]
Walkin, walkin, walkins dumb
Wish I could do the Edward run
Then I would be real quick too
And I could get home in time for Scooby Doo
If I was Edward, I would be
1,000,000 times hotter then he could ever be
And James would be afraid of me
I would live happily
If I could read peoples thoughts
I wanna have Edwards life
I wanna graduate a thousand times
[Chorus]
Cullen~
youtube.com/ImReallyWhiteYo
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3 | 5 | 3 | 1 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4 | 16 | 2 | 3 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5 | 30 | 51 | 51 |
User Comments Follow...
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Crummy book, hilarious parody.
LMAO THIS MAKES ME POOP REALLY HARD
Yo! Your amazing Mr. Washable!
lol i like the song heartless but i love this song even more!!! twilight books and movies rock! :)
Lol. i totally love this parody!! the book is good.the movie is better.but this is the BEST!!
OME! :----D I luv that song, I downloaded it in my mp3.. n___n ♥
OMG XD thats hilarious!!!!!!!!!!! ahahahahahahahaha i love THIS!
I like your parody. LOL.
wow i found this song by mistake but this song is really funny!
love this song i had it on last night when i was comin home from new moon in da taxi
ahaha i hate the original song but this is funnny. love the books and the movie and edward cullenn
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