I got a broken back (Ow!)
Because my shades were just too damn black (Damn!)
Walked on the street, there came a truck then SMACK! (Ouch!)
So that is why my back is oh so cracked (Ow!)

Lyin' on the road!

Hey you there!
Why can't you see that I'm in need of care?
I just got run over in Hindmarsh Square
Please help me up before I start to swear

Take me to the ER!

You the nurse?
(Need more anaesthetic)
I broke my cast
(Need more anaesthetic)
Now I see
(Need more anaesthetic)
My chest bleed
(Need more anaesthetic)
And I need some more paper towels
(Need more anaesthetic)
Look at my lips
(Need more anaesthetic)
Just cannot smile
(Need more anaesthetic)
The pain ain't mild
(Need more anaesthetic)

Now fix my broken back
(Need more anaesthetic)
And my broken leg
(Need more anaesthetic)
And my broken arm
(Need more anaesthetic)
AAnd my broken neck
(Need more anaesthetic)
And my broken head
(Need more anaesthetic)
And my broken hip
(Need more anaesthetic)
And my broken nose
(Need more anaesthetic)
All my broken bones

I broke my back again (Ow!)
Five minutes since I left the Ward For Men (Damn!)
I walked into the ambulance's lane (Ouch!)
One came 'round the corner, and I'm in such pain (Ow!)

Back in here again!

It's not fair
'Cause once again I'm stuck in a wheelchair
Casts ev'rywhere except my face and hair
It takes too long for my bones to repair

Please just take me home now!

What was that?
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
You wanna what?
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign my cast?
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Be my guest
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Don't be long, 'cause there is a line
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Write what you want
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Name will do fine
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Or a quick line
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)

Sign your name anywhere
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my leg
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my arm
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my hip
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my chest
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my back
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Sign it on my gut
(I'm wrapped up in plaster)
Don't you dare say 'But...'!

I'm now out of my cast (Yay!)
That's now the seventh time I've broke my back (Ow!)
And all the other bones that you can crack (Ouch!)
Guess it won't be long before I hit a Mac (Truck!)

"LOOK OUT FOR THAT SCHOOL BUS!"

Thank you, man
(That bus nearly hit me)
I'm sick of this
(It's getting really old)
Being smashed
(It's getting really old)
Wrapped in casts
(It's getting really old)
I am bored of the hospital
(It's getting really old)
Sick of this bed
(It's getting really old)
That bus is back
(It's getting really old)
Guess who got smacked?
(It's getting really old)

I'm back in here again
(It's getting really old)
Back in this old bed
(It's getting really old)
'Cause I broke my head
(It's getting really old)
Least I got cable
(This ain't so bad, is it?)
And the food tastes great
(This ain't so bad, is it?)
Nurses are so nice
(This ain't so bad, is it?)
Doctors give advice
(This ain't so bad, is it?)
Yes, this will suffice!