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Song Parodies -> "The Great Escape"

Original Song Title:

"The Sweet Escape"

Original Performer:

Gwen Stefani

Parody Song Title:

"The Great Escape"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "United State of Pop" self-challenge. No, not related to the Steve McQueen movie, this is just an inmate talking about his plans of escaping his current predicament.
Convict, convict, convict
Out soon, free soon
Out soon, free soon
Out soon, free soon
Out soon, free soon

I'm gonna escape
Been workin' on my plan for ten da-ays
I've only been in here for five, knew I was gonna be in jai-ail
Cause when one breaks in through the roof and cracks the safe door
Of the town's biggest bank, kicks the guards in the balls
Then there's no way in hell they won't slam the jail doo-oo-oors (doo-oo-oors)

But I will escape (escape)
Don't know which crazy heist I'll pull o-off first (which fi-i-irst)
Not gonna simply dig through the di-irt, not clever
Nope, my plan is better
Diggin' a hole? That's borin' as can be (weak escape)
So I will be free (be free) (tell ya, boy)
I scratched this plan out in the-e dirt (the di-i-irt) (the dirt, I scraped)
Six times the guards rubbed it out, what je-erks (ah, whatever)
You know I'm unfettered
And nothin' will stop me from bein' free (great escape, great escape)

Out soon, free soon (don't wanna waste away, waste away)
Out soon, free soon (I'll make a great escape, great escape)
Out soon, free soon (I'm gonna get away, get away)
Out soon, free soon (yeah-eah, yeah-eah)

What I need now is implements to blo-ow this joint
Come help me out, I've got some things I need to purloin
A plastic cow, one of those robots that dance around
Don't ask me questions right now, I know how it'll work out
Just trust me, I know I'm soundin' nutsy
Maybe at plans I'm a little rusty
Cause I need a fork that's crusty
I know you're gettin' antsy-y
Cause my plan seems all crazy
Needin' a pot of gravy
It'll help me get free-ee

So help me escape (escape)
I'll need a tiny statue of a-a bird (a bi-i-ird)
Two uniforms nicked from those guard je-erks, and never
Would they guess how clever
I'd use the uniforms to get me free? (great escape)
Because as you see (you see) (tell ya, boy)
My plans are sure not straightfo-orward (forwa-a-ard) (it's how they're great)
A guard disguise? Hell no, that's absu-urd (can do better)
My plan's much more clever
Now fetch some clogs and stop questionin' me (great escape, great escape)

Out soon, free soon
Out soon, free soon (from jail, I'll escape)
Out soon, free soon (I'll need a plush ape)
Out soon, free soon

Okay, step six of my plan deals with the big jail doors
I'll need acid and files and five tiles from the floor
And a flash drive with a bootleg copy of Spo-o-ore (Spo-o-ore)?

I know I'll escape (escape)
And continue my crime spree 'cross the-e world (the wo-o-orld)
Like taping photos of shoes to bi-irds, whatever
But that's comin' later
To do that, first I gotta get me free (great escape)
I'd love to be free (be free) (tell ya, boy)
I'm here cause that cop was a-a jerk (real je-e-erk) ()
So what if I drew dicks on that cle-erk? (he deserved it)
Not the point, now is it?
The point is that soon I'm gonna be free (great escape, great escape)

Out soon, free soon (I'm breakin' out today, out today)
Out soon, free soon (I'll make a great escape, great escape)
Out soon, free soon (write you a card, okay, card, okay)
Out soon, free soon (yeah-eah, yeah-eah)
Out soon, free soon
Out soon, free soon

Wow, Akon's guest spot in this song was seven kinds of pointless, wasn't it? A coupla throwaway lines and that obnoxious OOHOO WEEHOO crap.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Blaydeman - October 07, 2014 - Report this comment
THis was a lot of fun, TCOP! A new favorites of mine. It was random and silly, but with a strong point of view. This plan seems very elaborate! I would love to see it diagrammed out. LOL!

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