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Song Parodies -> "Exercise"

Original Song Title:

"Kryptonite"

Original Performer:

Guy Sebastian

Parody Song Title:

"Exercise"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

I had an idea, then it morphed into a different idea whilst writing. This is because I'm mental. Also: Guy Sebastian (the winner of the first Australian Idol and former owner of a sweet 'fro) used to give singing lessons at my school. I find that interesting.
Since I'm very lazy, buddy, my legs aren't in use
My socks are stuck to my heels, they're smelly too
They smell like shite

I couldn't be arsed getting up to get a can of booze
So you could please get a glass of dry vermouth
Nice wine, stop whinin'

It won't take long, see the look in my eyes?
It means I still have my eatin' knife

Buddy, I can't be arsed movin'
Think I'd rather spend my day groovin'
In my bed with some booze
And I tell you, it's no lie
I cannot do that "exercise"

I notice you're continuing to rant at me tonight
Yeah, you're mad as hell, that I cannot deny
Man, I'm sick and tired

Of listening to you, even I know that you are right
Cause I know that after this, you'll get my wine
Large glass this time!

Here so long, I cannot see my thighs
Melded into the bedsheets, that's right

Buddy, you know I ain't movin'
You're lucky that I am not snoozin'
My snoring angers you
Maybe once I have my wine
I'll try some of that "exercise"

Cause although I treat you like poo
I am still a bit fond of you
No, not in that way, dude
There's a crowbar to the right
Get me out, then I'll exercise

I've tried so hard to please you, bro
Even though I'm such a lazy butt inside
Kind of in denial that you're a friend to me
Now bud, please help me get up, yeah

Buddy, I'm stuck in this bedding
Maybe I've taken root or something
It's really freaky, dude
If you get me out this shite
I promise I will exercise

Get some butter or some grease, dude
Should be some from all my fast food
As methods go, it's crude
But I'm getting out tonight
Cause I'm in need of exercise

Buddy, I think that I'm moving
Holy crap, my plan is working
I'm just as freaked as you
Now that I'm free of this shite
Let's get on with that exercise
"Whinin'" gets blended into one syllable in this song, as does "denial" into two syllables. That's just how Guy sings.

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Porfle Popnecker - September 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Yet ANOTHER chapter in my life story. Another few parodies like this and I'll be able to compile my autobiography.
Matthias - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Too bad the first round of Ages wasn't the 2000s because this parody was awesome and I know more about this topic than cricket. Well done.
Agrimorfee - September 28, 2011 - Report this comment
OS was very hard to follow along with your lyrics (same thing if one tried reading Weird Al's "Confessions Part 3" I would imagine. Interesting that your parody didnt take the cynical route...the singer actually does something at the end and improves. Security Code appropriately HAM.
Blaydeman - October 03, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I'm exhausted just reading this thing, but it's a good exhausted. Good job TCOP!
Rex - October 09, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) [Sets down glass of beer and reaches over to nightstand for his laptop, starts typing comment] Staying in bed so long you're melded into the sheets? That's ridicu-- [looks down] uh-oh. Uh, little help? Anyone? Funny concept, Conq.
Below Average Dave - October 12, 2011 - Report this comment
The original song is very unique, artist is smooth. Your parody read a bit funny to the original, I also am unfamiliar with some of the terminology (I assume vermouth is an alcoholic beverage) or how certain things would work (the look in your eye meaning you still have your knife). That said, the song choice and idea were both good. Its a song that seems harder to write than it may appear just listening to the original:)

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