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Song Parodies -> "Big Girls Don't Dive"

Original Song Title:

"Big Girls Don't Cry"

Original Performer:

Fergie

Parody Song Title:

"Big Girls Don't Dive"

Parody Written by:

BonnieB

The Lyrics

Do do do do

The smell of lotion lingers on me now
I'm really on my way up to Watertown
I need to swelter and bake in the sunshine all day
And be with myself it's summer, sunshine, tan lifeguards


There she comes, There she comes
Big Betty's climbing up the diving board
Oh don't she know she shouldn't try
Weighs 300 lbs or even more
I hope she misses that small child in the floatee
Oh Mama get a move on grab your child
It's time to clear the water, now
Big girls don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive


The suit that she's wearing
Was made for her alone
It must have taken a week and three people to get sewn, get sewn
Bikinis weren't made to cover all that flesh, now were they?
All the boys have laughed at her all day


There she comes, There she comes
Big Betty's climbing up the diving board
Oh don't she know she shouldn't try
Weighs 300 lbs or even more
I hope she misses that small child in the floatee
Oh Mama get a move on grab your child
It's time to clear the water, now
Big girls don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive


Like a great blue whale on the diving board
We'll stand back and watch her soar
I'll be up on land and I hope you will, too
Panic ensues as they clear the pool
Oh dear God this just aint cool
They'll be no water, no noise, or people left to swim
Now it's time for me to go home
It's getting late, dark outside
Now I'm by myself, it's summer, no sunshine, but there's that lifeguard


There she comes, There she comes
Big Betty's climbing up the diving board
Oh don't she know she shouldn't try
Weighs 300 lbs or even more
I hope she misses that small child in the floatee
Oh Mama get a move on grab your child
It's time to clear the water, now
Big girls don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive
Don't dive


La da da da da da







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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.1

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 1
 
 2   0
 1
 0
 
 3   3
 2
 2
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

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