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Song Parodies -> "Gopher"

Original Song Title:

"Soldier"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Eminem

Parody Song Title:

"Gopher"

Parody Written by:

Timinem

The Lyrics

Watch the "I'm Sorry Llama" video at www.therealtimshady.com!
I'm a gopher
I'm a gopher
I'm a gopher
I'm a gopher

Yo
Never was a slug just infatuated with mud
Never needed a shovel for any holes that I've dug
I got the rep of a nuisance, for soil I've loosened
Diggin' lots of tunnels with the help of my cousins
In your big ol' backyard disregard all the garden that's marred
Even though it's scarred on your guard
When you're me, just gotta do what you do till you're through
Chewin' lots tubers, veggies, roots
So every time when you see we've got our bellies filled
People bitch and scream and they wanna have us killed
Aggravation, total desperation's what they feel
Our annihilation, termination's the wish they want fulfilled
If they see us, shoot us, if they catch us, boot us
Be unreasonable pouring poison in our tunnels, funnel water in our mazes
Chase us, phase us out, geez!
Away master gardener and leave us in peace, please!

I'm a gopher
These little claws and paws dig up so much I'm eatin' shrubs for my lunch
I'm a gopher
Even if a hose flows down my go-hole, try to wash me out I won't budge
I'm a gopher
These gardens grow up so much, they're like fudge, and they don't cost me a buck
I'm a gopher
Even if Bill Murray blows all my mounds up, I'll just titter like a woodchuck

I love tickin' you off, when you play golf
Like your ball when I hide it and you think it's lost
All you stupid golfers gotta do is make me cross
Like irrigatin' - and my home gets waterlogged
I'm a big pest all I ever do is cause stress
Chewin' up your daises till your wife gets depressed
Who needs flowers? When I devour you get sour
Chase me 'cross the yard on your power lawn mower
And I'm actually faster than a mole or a squirrel
You can't beat me I'll come back again with a girl
Cuz there's plenty of room, she'll have babes in her womb
They'll be poppin' out and poopin' in your garden next June
We'll make a bunch of hills, it's such a thrill
Livin' larger than my boy Punxsutawney Phil
Spottin' shadows is a cool meteorological skill
Gonna snow more? Hell, I don't know if it will

I'm a gopher
These little claws and paws dig up so much I'm eatin' shrubs for my lunch
I'm a gopher
Even if a hose flows down my go-hole, try to wash me out I won't budge
I'm a gopher
These gardens grow up so much, they're like fudge, and they don't cost me a buck
I'm a gopher
Even if Bill Murray blows all my mounds up, I'll just titter like a woodchuck

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   1
 1
 1
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

M-Dawg - June 02, 2004 - Report this comment
i liked it tho there was no third verse
MrMacphisto - June 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Nice movie references
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - June 02, 2004 - Report this comment
I have an urge to goaround to all of your unfinished masterpieces and do a last verse for them all for closure. Once again, totally brilliant rhyming and a whimsical angle. I also liked the Bill Murray comment. 5-4-5
iisryan - August 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Nice job on this one. You do a good job staying on topic and keeping it funny.
mwzk - December 03, 2010 - Report this comment
there is no third verse, but good job on the first two

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