Song Parodies -> The Diarrhea Song
| Original Song Title: | "Cleaning Out My Closet" |
| Original Performer: | Eminem |
| Parody Song Title: | "The Diarrhea Song" |
| Parody Written by: | Joey Lawrence (no, not the actor) |
The pacing may not be the best, but I still think it's alright. Hey and my personal favorite lyrics are in verse 2, the fourth and fifth lines. It's hysterical!
Have you ever been in the middle of a piddle, I ask
I have, I've been crapping on my mother's big carpet I guess
Eating mounds for pounds of that granola shit, I'm holding in shit
Sick in the stomach and I have to throw up
Momma, take me to the doctor cause I'm gonna erupt
Drive me there as fast as you can, amps on the whamps
Man, I got the cramps, hold it in as long as I'm still breathing
Keep farting out fumes in the morning, everybody's mourning
Leave 'em with a smell so sour like vinegar in your mouth
See, they can say it was me but they never figure me out
Smelling me now, I bet you're probably sick of me now
Hurry up now Momma, gonna let it out now
CHORUS
I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office
I said I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office
I got crap locked up in my closet and I don't know if no one knows it
So before they throw me in the bathroom and let me expose it, I'm gonna blow it
I'll take you back to seventy-six where I was just a little kid blowing out farts and the shit
I was a baby, maybe just a couple of weeks
My fucking Huggies didn't help me cause I always got leaks
I wonder how I even got by
No, on second thought, when I farted, I would always just lie
Look at me now, always getting pains in my side
Wish I hadn't eaten all them fucking beans on the side
Even if I hated to fart, I grit my teeth and just try
Had to do it for my manners sake
I maybe made some mistakes, I'm only human
But I'm man enough to face my own smell today
What I was let out was grotesque, no doubt it was gross
The smartest shit I did was didn't bother to boast
Cause I would have boasted, and I'd be proud of my smell
It's my life, I'd like to welcome y'all to the Diarrhea Hell
CHORUS
Now I would never break wind just to get recognition
Take a second listen before you think my smell's aprehensive
But put yourself in my position
Try to envision shtting wherever you go
Hemmerhoid cream in the kitchen
Bitching that someone's always in the tub
A-scrub-a-dub-dub
Going through Mylanta like it came from a tap
And all it gives me now is the mother-fucking cramps
Going into public bathrooms
And putting paper around
So I wouldn't catch AIDS or HIV or whatever the hell else
But guess what, I'm older and it stops
My shit doesn't always eject in those little bitty drops
See what hurts me the most is that I shit on your floor
I rather rub it on your walls and then do it some more
But how dare you try to put me on them prescription pills
I get the mother-fucking cramps when I'd be walking up hills
You selfish doc, I hope you burn up your cock
Remember when Donna died of frantic diarrhea
Guess what, she passed it on down to me-ah
CHORUS
I have, I've been crapping on my mother's big carpet I guess
Eating mounds for pounds of that granola shit, I'm holding in shit
Sick in the stomach and I have to throw up
Momma, take me to the doctor cause I'm gonna erupt
Drive me there as fast as you can, amps on the whamps
Man, I got the cramps, hold it in as long as I'm still breathing
Keep farting out fumes in the morning, everybody's mourning
Leave 'em with a smell so sour like vinegar in your mouth
See, they can say it was me but they never figure me out
Smelling me now, I bet you're probably sick of me now
Hurry up now Momma, gonna let it out now
CHORUS
I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office
I said I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office
I got crap locked up in my closet and I don't know if no one knows it
So before they throw me in the bathroom and let me expose it, I'm gonna blow it
I'll take you back to seventy-six where I was just a little kid blowing out farts and the shit
I was a baby, maybe just a couple of weeks
My fucking Huggies didn't help me cause I always got leaks
I wonder how I even got by
No, on second thought, when I farted, I would always just lie
Look at me now, always getting pains in my side
Wish I hadn't eaten all them fucking beans on the side
Even if I hated to fart, I grit my teeth and just try
Had to do it for my manners sake
I maybe made some mistakes, I'm only human
But I'm man enough to face my own smell today
What I was let out was grotesque, no doubt it was gross
The smartest shit I did was didn't bother to boast
Cause I would have boasted, and I'd be proud of my smell
It's my life, I'd like to welcome y'all to the Diarrhea Hell
CHORUS
Now I would never break wind just to get recognition
Take a second listen before you think my smell's aprehensive
But put yourself in my position
Try to envision shtting wherever you go
Hemmerhoid cream in the kitchen
Bitching that someone's always in the tub
A-scrub-a-dub-dub
Going through Mylanta like it came from a tap
And all it gives me now is the mother-fucking cramps
Going into public bathrooms
And putting paper around
So I wouldn't catch AIDS or HIV or whatever the hell else
But guess what, I'm older and it stops
My shit doesn't always eject in those little bitty drops
See what hurts me the most is that I shit on your floor
I rather rub it on your walls and then do it some more
But how dare you try to put me on them prescription pills
I get the mother-fucking cramps when I'd be walking up hills
You selfish doc, I hope you burn up your cock
Remember when Donna died of frantic diarrhea
Guess what, she passed it on down to me-ah
CHORUS
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 1 | 10 | 10 | 11 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3 | 4 | 1 | 2 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4 | 3 | 2 | 4 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5 | 11 | 15 | 11 |
User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Your pacing was pretty average, your rhymes even worse. I rated you high for humour, but only because the mere mention of bowel movement has me in hysterics. 3-4-3
it was funny...whatever that jake kid said could like..sh...rarr..this song is funny...the rhyming..hey who cares?!...ITS FUNNY. :-).... 3-5-4
I think I'm going 2 be sick.
This parody is superpooperdooper! I give it a perfect score!
aoid: is it really that much easier to type in the number 2 than it is to write the word "to?"
Wondering: I really don't think it matters much. People type the numeral 2 all the time when they mean "to"; do you really need to criticize that?
Poopy Longstockign (or whoever the hell you are): I really am getting sick of your immature comments. It's obvious that you're not more than two years old (at least mentally).
Poopy Longstockign (or whoever the hell you are): I really am getting sick of your immature comments. It's obvious that you're not more than two years old (at least mentally).
Ha Ha - you said number 2.
I said NUMERAL two, you nit wit. Read carefully.
I don't think I've ever seen someone misspell "nitwit." That's classic.
So? Some people use it as two words.
Such people personify the term.
you're right, aoid: i do not NEED to criticize people for using the number 2 when they mean "to" any more than you NEED to read parodies that you KNOW you're going to hate. however, i CHOOSE to criticize those people. especially when they are overly critical themselves. admit it, you are. i also CHOOSE to criticize people who put their semi-colons outside of their quotation marks, because that is bad grammar. i ALSO choose to criticize people who spell "longstocking" wrong.
My feces are super-powerful.....it is my hope that this bit of information might provide a modicum of colour for this brilliant discussion of arse-shagging silliness.
All right, Poopie Whateverthehellyournameis, I really am sick of your immature comments. If you make one more stupid response to my comments, I swear I will report yours as inappropriate and have Chucky ban your IP for all eternity. And I am a man.
If I could vote zeros, I would.
(in case you were wondering what it stands for)
That's NOT what it stands for! Get a life!
Mr. Aoid, don't let these idiots get you down. I think you are doing everyone a service. Keep up the good work and stand up for your principles. You have a lot of courage and an important message of intellectual maturity and purity. Thank you for being you!
Hugh G. Reckshun, I would like to introduce you to Mike Hunt.
Aren'tcha gonna introduce him to me, too?
I agree with TABWC about the idiots. Also, please keep misspelling your own acronym. 'Cause that's funny.
*uhh!* *URRRGHH!!* *ploop-splash!* *ahhhh........*
Quite frankly, I don't know that AOID is really an acronym. Maybe Aoid himself will tell us what it really means.
Aoid is MALE, for your information. I know him personally. I met him a few days ago.
I still approve of this parody immensely!
I don't. Does Pootie Longstalking even know any Eminem songs?
U people really r dumb.
All cleaned out your bowels and closets now boys and girls? Then let me begin.......
this song ROCKS the poop industry!!!! we wanna fart just reading this... POOP IS OUR HEROES!!!!!
Who the hell are you??
Sorry maye, but this sucked.
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