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Song Parodies -> "The Diarrhea Song"

Original Song Title:

"Cleaning Out My Closet"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Eminem

Parody Song Title:

"The Diarrhea Song"

The Lyrics

The pacing may not be the best, but I still think it's alright. Hey and my personal favorite lyrics are in verse 2, the fourth and fifth lines. It's hysterical!
Have you ever been in the middle of a piddle, I ask
I have, I've been crapping on my mother's big carpet I guess
Eating mounds for pounds of that granola shit, I'm holding in shit
Sick in the stomach and I have to throw up
Momma, take me to the doctor cause I'm gonna erupt
Drive me there as fast as you can, amps on the whamps
Man, I got the cramps, hold it in as long as I'm still breathing
Keep farting out fumes in the morning, everybody's mourning
Leave 'em with a smell so sour like vinegar in your mouth
See, they can say it was me but they never figure me out
Smelling me now, I bet you're probably sick of me now
Hurry up now Momma, gonna let it out now

CHORUS
I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office
I said I'm sorry doctor
I never meant to shit, oooh
I never meant to shit on your floor
So tonight, I'm cleaning up your office

I got crap locked up in my closet and I don't know if no one knows it
So before they throw me in the bathroom and let me expose it, I'm gonna blow it
I'll take you back to seventy-six where I was just a little kid blowing out farts and the shit
I was a baby, maybe just a couple of weeks
My fucking Huggies didn't help me cause I always got leaks
I wonder how I even got by
No, on second thought, when I farted, I would always just lie
Look at me now, always getting pains in my side
Wish I hadn't eaten all them fucking beans on the side
Even if I hated to fart, I grit my teeth and just try
Had to do it for my manners sake
I maybe made some mistakes, I'm only human
But I'm man enough to face my own smell today
What I was let out was grotesque, no doubt it was gross
The smartest shit I did was didn't bother to boast
Cause I would have boasted, and I'd be proud of my smell
It's my life, I'd like to welcome y'all to the Diarrhea Hell

CHORUS

Now I would never break wind just to get recognition
Take a second listen before you think my smell's aprehensive
But put yourself in my position
Try to envision shtting wherever you go
Hemmerhoid cream in the kitchen
Bitching that someone's always in the tub
A-scrub-a-dub-dub
Going through Mylanta like it came from a tap
And all it gives me now is the mother-fucking cramps
Going into public bathrooms
And putting paper around
So I wouldn't catch AIDS or HIV or whatever the hell else
But guess what, I'm older and it stops
My shit doesn't always eject in those little bitty drops
See what hurts me the most is that I shit on your floor
I rather rub it on your walls and then do it some more
But how dare you try to put me on them prescription pills
I get the mother-fucking cramps when I'd be walking up hills
You selfish doc, I hope you burn up your cock
Remember when Donna died of frantic diarrhea
Guess what, she passed it on down to me-ah

CHORUS

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.1
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 30

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   11
 11
 12
 
 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   4
 1
 2
 
 4   3
 2
 4
 
 5   11
 15
 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Your pacing was pretty average, your rhymes even worse. I rated you high for humour, but only because the mere mention of bowel movement has me in hysterics. 3-4-3
Lena - August 02, 2004 - Report this comment
it was funny...whatever that jake kid said could like..sh...rarr..this song is funny...the rhyming..hey who cares?!...ITS FUNNY. :-).... 3-5-4
aoid - September 14, 2004 - Report this comment
I think I'm going 2 be sick.
Poopie Longstocking - September 14, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody is superpooperdooper! I give it a perfect score!
Wondering - September 14, 2004 - Report this comment
aoid: is it really that much easier to type in the number 2 than it is to write the word "to?"
aoid - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Wondering: I really don't think it matters much. People type the numeral 2 all the time when they mean "to"; do you really need to criticize that?

Poopy Longstockign (or whoever the hell you are): I really am getting sick of your immature comments. It's obvious that you're not more than two years old (at least mentally).
Poopy Long Droppings - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Ha Ha - you said number 2.
aoid - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
I said NUMERAL two, you nit wit. Read carefully.
Winnie the Poop - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't think I've ever seen someone misspell "nitwit." That's classic.
Hugh G. Reckshun - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
So? Some people use it as two words.
Winnie the Poop - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Such people personify the term.
Still Wondering - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
you're right, aoid: i do not NEED to criticize people for using the number 2 when they mean "to" any more than you NEED to read parodies that you KNOW you're going to hate. however, i CHOOSE to criticize those people. especially when they are overly critical themselves. admit it, you are. i also CHOOSE to criticize people who put their semi-colons outside of their quotation marks, because that is bad grammar. i ALSO choose to criticize people who spell "longstocking" wrong.
Pooperman From The Planet Drypton - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
My feces are super-powerful.....it is my hope that this bit of information might provide a modicum of colour for this brilliant discussion of arse-shagging silliness.
aoid - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
All right, Poopie Whateverthehellyournameis, I really am sick of your immature comments. If you make one more stupid response to my comments, I swear I will report yours as inappropriate and have Chucky ban your IP for all eternity. And I am a man.
Dan Druff - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
If I could vote zeros, I would.
Aficionado Of Intense Diarrhea - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
(in case you were wondering what it stands for)
aiod - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
That's NOT what it stands for! Get a life!
The Anti-Body-Waste Crusader - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Mr. Aoid, don't let these idiots get you down. I think you are doing everyone a service. Keep up the good work and stand up for your principles. You have a lot of courage and an important message of intellectual maturity and purity. Thank you for being you!
Dan Druff - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Aren'tcha gonna introduce him to me, too?
Aficionado Of Intense Diarrhea - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
I agree with TABWC about the idiots. Also, please keep misspelling your own acronym. 'Cause that's funny.
The Brown Power Ranger - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
*uhh!* *URRRGHH!!* *ploop-splash!* *ahhhh........*
i aint sayin - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Quite frankly, I don't know that AOID is really an acronym. Maybe Aoid himself will tell us what it really means.
i aint sayin #1 - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Aoid is MALE, for your information. I know him personally. I met him a few days ago.
Poopie Longstocking - March 21, 2005 - Report this comment
I still approve of this parody immensely!
neither "mr critic" nor "icky ticky tavi" - July 01, 2005 - Report this comment
I don't. Does Pootie Longstalking even know any Eminem songs?
u people r dumb - April 24, 2006 - Report this comment
U people really r dumb.
Char Lady - April 24, 2006 - Report this comment
All cleaned out your bowels and closets now boys and girls? Then let me begin.......
miss poopalatte - June 02, 2006 - Report this comment
this song ROCKS the poop industry!!!! we wanna fart just reading this... POOP IS OUR HEROES!!!!!
Lar Chady - June 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Who the hell are you??
Skip Boy - February 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Sorry maye, but this sucked.

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