1. Right now!/
Your girl's making noises that/if you heard her make them;/
You'd have an aneurysm!/

Right now!/
She's doing things too hot for TV;/
And I can feel the loving start to schism!

So now!/
You know she'll break your heart/and probably shoot you in the face/
Unless somebody takes some action!/

And I'm that someone!/

(First Chorus)

Cause I placed a pipe bomb/on the passenger side/
Of that pink convertible/that she loves to drive!/

Placed gunpowder in cracks between the seats.../

I've stashed nitroglycerin/under the hood!/
Rigged the ignition,/ fixed her up real good!/

Let this be a lesson to gals who cheat...

(Ha ha ha ha ha!)

2. And now!/
A gal in another town/is wearing green/and she isn't even single!/
Right now!/Her hubby's on the cell phone/
And she's not telling him/but she's dating Mr. Wringle!/

So now!/
She's tried my patience to the last;/
And she'll find out soon that/I won't show them any mercy!/

Just wait and see!!!/

(Second Chorus)

Cause I'll snipe a bullet/into his side/
And watch her scream in terror and try to hide!/

But my next trick is what's really neat!/

She'll try to flee down the stairs;/
Her head's in my sights!/
Next she knows; off goes the dynamite!/

Let's hope this is a lesson to gals who cheat!/

(Bridge)

I'm saving dirty bombs up for the next girl! (Next girl!)/

Cause the next time someone cheats.../oh!/
She'll get a visit from me.../

(Ha ha ha ha ha!)

(Final Chorus)

And I'll blast a hole/right into the side/
Of the house/of that cheating little runaway bride!/
Cheer as she tastes her utter defeat!/

I'll leave half her town smoking in a mushroom cloud;/
Then disappear laughing way out loud!/

Let this be a lesson to gals who cheat!/

Ohh...Let this be a lesson to gals who cheat!/

(Ha ha ha ha ha!)

(Instrumental Fade)