Ah So-so
The right answers I can't find
I count all ways~well over nine
I can't tell the length~its really naff
I tried a rod, a stick, a staff
I show and tell at front of class
To get results I know will pass
I drop metric itŐs a bore
Try imperial once more

That's what I got a rule for
Even odds all over the score
Calculators lazy
Points decimals all crazy
That's what I got a rule for
Even odds all over the score
Tape measures I've had plenty
From none to 9 or 20
That's what I got a rule for
That's what I got a rule for

The total may be 53
Must get it right~it bothers me
I've tried a plumb~line going down
I've even weighed it by the pound
I climb up walls, a loony gnome
Ignore folk calling on the phone
Can't get it right, it makes me swear
The counting stops, Im almost there

Thats what I got a rule for
Even odds all over the score
Calculators lazy
Spits numbers out like crazy
That's what I got a rule for
Even counting sheep til I snore
Tape measures I've had plenty
Say 10 or 12 or 20
That's what I got a rule for
That's what I got a rule for

How many times have I gotta say
The length is fine but the weight~no way
My marks~I spy
High on wall~make me cry
I can't see~going blind
Telling me glasses I must find
Ladder broke now Im on the floor
And you told me
Thats what you use a stool for
Thats what you use a stool for

I light a fag,
Im smoking skunk
The numbers double, read like junk
Get out a tool~I gotta try
My hammer strikes me on the thigh

That's what I got a rule for
Even odds all over the score
Calculators lazy
Points decimals all crazy
That's what I got a rule for
Even odds all over the score
Tape measures I've had plenty
From none to 9 or 20
That's what I got a rule for
That's what I got a rule for