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Song Parodies -> "Contagious (The Typhoid Mary Story)"

Original Song Title:

"Contagious"

Original Performer:

Avril Levine

Parody Song Title:

"Contagious (The Typhoid Mary Story)"

Parody Written by:

Rex Ungericht

The Lyrics

Yes, I know the disease was most likely transmitted via uncooked food. Mumble mumble artistic license mumble mumble. You can hear the original song on YouTube.
Uh oh
Uh oh

She comes to town and gets work as a cook
She feeds her patrons everyday
They start thinkin' they've got stomach flu
And then she packs and moves away

With bacterial french fries
And epidemic apple pie
She will risk human life
Does she ever wonder why

She's so contagious
There's pathogens stirred in the stir fry
It's so delicious
So tasty you could die
Anytime

Uh oh
Uh oh

Then one day a stricken family
Employed a guy to check around
Found a cook who had a history
That's when he had it figured out

Tracked her down to the east side
The truth was right there in his file
He accused, she denied
Kept on cooking all the while

She's so contagious
She's serving Sam & Ella at nine
It's so audacious
C'mon it's time to dine

Plague-laden chicken wings
For you tonight
Tainted beans, virulent yams
Illness in each bite

She's so contagious
She thinks "hygiene" is greeting some guy
She gets her wages
And then she says goodbye

She's so contagious
She makes a killer boston cream pie
She's so infectious
That's why she's now confined
All the time

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - April 22, 2013 - Report this comment
This is a pretty good story for a horror movie. The only problem I have with this parody is that it's spelled "Lavigne" not "Levine" other than that 100 percent awesome.
Max Power - April 28, 2013 - Report this comment
Left a bad taste in my mouth but this parody is the best spice needed.
Arwen - May 03, 2013 - Report this comment
Artistry...Oh, Hi Gene...er Rex! :) This was fun...in a super gross sort of way...excellent job!
Agrimorfee - May 05, 2013 - Report this comment
This is a true story, in case you didn't know already. Nicely done, Rex, the puns were the highight for me.
bobpiecheese - May 07, 2013 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Indeed, the real Typhoid Mary was the first identified person to be a carrier for typhoid while still being healthy herself. Not that something silly like facts is gonna stop me from enjoying a very well-written parody about either a malicious serial killer or a sympathetic ditz. I like alternate interpretations. 555!
Blaydeman - May 07, 2013 - Report this comment
(Artistry) This parody's fun energy is contagious. Hilarious! Loved the pun work.

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