His name was Roy
He didn't like girls
That is just extraterrestrial
He was no hunk
He was not OK
Just one sad mental case
He hid from the world
Like a hermit crab
But if you saw him he'd be looking real drab
Now the FBI
Want to kick his butt
Because he somehow earned them a pay-cut

They called him Mr Roy
He was just a sissy boy
We think he's allergic to girls
He wears makeup on his face
Looks like he came from outer space
It makes you wanna shove him in the dirt

4 weeks from today
He'll buy some cologne
Ringing his 'girlfriend' on his mobile phone
We must all agree
Some magical debris
Must have got into this guy's pearl ice tea
So then he pretends
It was some dumb show
And all along he thought we didn't know
He was wearing a thong
The wrong way around
Feeling embarrassed, he stared at the ground

[Chorus 1]

Sorry Roy, without a doubt
You've got the brain of an old cow
This is why you've got no friends
Watch your reputation descend
We pay you out every day
In every imaginable way
We'll give you zero sympathy
Until pain is inflicted to thee

His name is Roy
He's one weird boy
We couldn't get anymore malevolent
He's just our tool
For our evil schemes
Bringing down his self-esteem

And this we say to Roy
'Only you we want to destroy'
Oh we didn't mean any offence
We'll grab you by the throat
Wielding those knives we tote
Making mincemeat of your defence...
And this we say to Roy
'Only you we want to destroy'
Oh we didn't mean any offence
We'll grab you by the throat
Wielding those knives we tote
Making mincemeat of your defence...