Yeah,
The pressure's buildin' up,
(Oh!),
My brain is full of stuff,
(Oh!),
Like elephants on tricycles and detailed maps of the old Fort Bluff,
Yes, everything has changed,
(Oh!),
I'm mentally deranged,
(Oh!),
If I'm invisible, then how does the mailman know my name?
And I'm probably insane,
But I swear there are cameras up and down my lane,
I may be crazy, mayne,
But I have to find out what these spies are trying to gain,

Now I've spent months in my notebook,
Found out the government took,
The original footage of the Swedish Cook,
And I just wanna know,
What use would they have for that? Don't see,
And why are they watching me?
And how are they working with the dairy industry?
And now I've gotta let you know,

I might be insane (oh),
Could be something wrong with my brain (ey),
But there's a mystery for me today,
Up in my house,
(And now I must investigate),
I don't know why I'm in a gown (ey),
But I do know there are Soviets around (oh),
The truth is running around,
Just like a mouse (ey),
(And I don't understand),

There's tons more people now (now),
In the conspiracy cover-up now (now),
I'd look in the mirror, but who knows if it is bugged somehow,
I'm getting closer; this is no time to settle down.
Who do the Catholics pay?
My next door neighbor,
Who's clearly working for,
A tiny man who lives in an apple core,
I can't believe my eyes,
I'm caught in a web of lies,

Now it's been years since the Roswell crash,
But where did the government get that cash?
It's hard to believe that came from sales tax...
And now I have to let you know,
If anybody out there can hear me,
My discoveries can help humanity,
Stop the evils of Chuck E. Cheese,
Listen to my theory, please,
Now I've got to let you know,

I might be insane (oh),
Could be something wrong with my brain (ey),
But HeadOn causes back pain,
Yes, I have proof,
That's why I've got to let you know,
Nintendo is planning around (ey),
To shut the internet down (oh),
To take all of the world's cows,
All for themselves.