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Song Parodies -> "Psychic Phoneline Blues"
Original Song Title:
"East Virginia Blues"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"Psychic Phoneline Blues"
Parody Written by:
MooRocca
The Lyrics
aka (I Was Born in) East Virginia -- as with many folk and bluegrass standards, about a zillion versions of this song exist, lyrics and number of verses vary from rendition to rendition, but the melody should be close enough to rate pacing to almost any version. The specific version I'm parodying is from Rhino Handmade's The Monkees HeadQuarters Sessions box, because that happens to be my favorite version.
I was torn
In two directions
Didn't know which way to go
So I called
A psychic phone line
Which path to take
I hoped they'd know
I sat on hold
For seven hours
B'fore someone came on the line
She said "I see
A big bill coming."
I asked "You do!?"
She said, "Yeah, mine."
I've lost my home
And my possessions
Just to pay that whopping bill
I'm in debt
No paths before me
It's been six years,
I'm paying still
So, if you're torn
In two directions
And you don't know which way to go
Please don't call
A psychic phone line
Just flip a coin
(I wish I'd known.)
I'd flip a coin
If I had known
In two directions
Didn't know which way to go
So I called
A psychic phone line
Which path to take
I hoped they'd know
I sat on hold
For seven hours
B'fore someone came on the line
She said "I see
A big bill coming."
I asked "You do!?"
She said, "Yeah, mine."
I've lost my home
And my possessions
Just to pay that whopping bill
I'm in debt
No paths before me
It's been six years,
I'm paying still
So, if you're torn
In two directions
And you don't know which way to go
Please don't call
A psychic phone line
Just flip a coin
(I wish I'd known.)
I'd flip a coin
If I had known
Your Vote & Comment Counts
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 2 | 2 | 2 |
User Comments
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What, no comments? I don't remember the Monkees version but I thought this was great. (Yeah mine) I saw an ad in the paper that cracked me up... "Telephone hotline needs psychics---will train!" If you've ever studied tapes of people conversing with those people,(hucksters) you find that the customers (rubes) easily volunteer much of the information that is later fed back to them as "readings". Heck, Dr. Laura does it.
Thanks Rick. I haven't seen that ad... but you're right, it's hilarious!
I can't rightly say which of the zillion versions of East Virginia Blues is my favorite, since I've never heard of the song - or the state (I had a sheltered upbringing) - but I couldn't bear to see any Melhi parody stuck at a mere 3 votes.
Aw, thanks Spaff. :)
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