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Song Parodies -> "If I Only Had a Mane"

Original Song Title:

"If I Only Had a Brain"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Wizard of Oz

Parody Song Title:

"If I Only Had a Mane"

Parody Written by:

Mr Find

The Lyrics

While this song is another one of my TV show Lost themed parodies, it is one non-Lost fans may be able to relate to, especially if they are follically-challenged, weight-challenged, or morally challenged. It is from a purportedly deleted scene of Locke, Hurley (aka Hugo) and Ben during their search for Jacob's shack back in season four. Please note that the spoken parts are in parentheses.
LOCKE:
(Okay, boys, let's express our blues to the tune of "If I Only Had A Brain"...
and a one... and a two... and a...)
I could wash it in all hours
Organics with rare flowers
Cond'tioning with the rain
And my head would be dashin'
All my hair is so smashin'
If I only had a mane


I'd unravel all my tangles
Like one of The Bangles
Forget about Rogaine

HURLEY:
With the hair you'd be growin'
It could be to ass-below'n
If you only had a mane


LOCKE:
Oh, I would brag 'bout why
My coiffure's sheer allure
I could tint it colors never thunk before
And then I'd tease it some more


HURLEY:
(Okay, my turn.)
I would forget about that muffin
Pass up on all that stuffin'
My menus full of plain
I won't be fat and merry -
Ho, ho, ho, nose like a cherry
If my appetite would wane

(BEN: Now, my turn. I WOULD BE SO-
LOCKE: Stop it right there, Ben. There are no more verses left.
BEN: Huh? Whaddyamean there are no more verses left?
LOCKE: The song is finished. I guess you will have to do
your thing to the "If I Only Had a HEART" song.
HURLEY: Wait a minute. I thought the point was to CHANGE the words.
BEN: I don't think that is very funny, Hugo.)
Check out more Lost song parodies at: Lost: The Rock Opera.

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

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Andria - June 16, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm not follically challenged by any means, considering that I have 33-inch-long curly hair, but this was a bang-up job on your parody, Mr. Find. (pun on "bang", as in "bangs", wholly intended) 555 bottles of Rogaine for you.
Timmy1000 - June 16, 2009 - Report this comment
As a Lost fan - good job on this one.
Wufpakgrl - June 17, 2009 - Report this comment
very nice, I give you a full rating
Bilbopooh - July 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Hee! Very nice job. I especially like the Locke verses. And poor Ben... At least it looks like he got his heart after all!

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