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Song Parodies -> "I Am The Garnish"

Original Song Title:

"I Am The Walrus"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"I Am The Garnish"

Parody Written by:

Mick Capewell

The Lyrics

This is taken from the 1967 TV Documentary 'Medical Catering Tour'--an investigation into the merits of hospital food.
I am ill as you are ill as we are stuck here in this ward together
See how runny my egg yokes are see how they run
I'm hungry

Spilling my cornflakes waiting for a drink to come
Calamity menu, fish on a Tuesday
Man you're gonna choke because
You didn't pick out the bones
These are the dregs, man
Where are my eggs, man?
This tastes like varnish

Mister idiot Porter putting
Soggy little soldiers in a row
See how they crumble as we fumble for a fork
I'm hungry

Barely yellow custard, too runny or too dry
Poisoned crabby fishy, last rites from the priest-y
Man, you're gonna stink because
You forgot your bed-pan
This is your breakfast
That was your breakfast
I am the garnish

Lying in an English Hospital waiting for lunch
If your lunch don't come, you forgot to tick
A box on the proper form
Where is your head, man?
You are a dead man
I am the garnish

Surgeon sturgeon splurging gorging don't you think
The doctor's laugh at you! Ha ha ha!
See how they smile at the bunch of senile
I'm hungry

Aspirin bottles stacked up in a tower
Agonized people whinging Merry-Hell, man
Fix them up with grapes brought in by your Auntie Flo
You need your medicine
Gimme your bread, son
I am the garnish

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   1
 3   1
 4   5
 5   3

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