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Song Parodies -> "HK Still After You"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"HK Still After You"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The US Army has switched to the M4, a carbine version of the M16 with a shorter barrel. The H&K G36 is the current market leader and was adopted in modified form as the rifle element of the original OICW project. The G36 also formed the basis of the XM8, which was being developed in several versions to replace the M16/M4 family and the M249 SAW. However, the US Army's adoption of this was first held up by a decision to reopen the selection to competition, then that competition was put on hold pending consideration of other services' needs, then it was delayed again to take account of the lessons from Iraq and Afghanistan, before (in early 2006) being deferred for at least five years, apparently because the National Audit Office criticised the project for offering insufficient benefits for the expenditure involved. Real cause- stigma of adoption of German main rifle for US and demise of Colt military arms with a third time bailout by Congress! However, the US special forces (SOCOM) are going ahead with the adoption of the FN SCAR rifle/carbine in Light (MK 16 in 5.56x45) and Heavy (MK 17 in 7.62x51) versions. Heckler & Koch also offer paired 5.56mm and 7.62mm weapons, the HK416 and HK417 respectively. The photo below shows the HK416 at the top, the HK417 at the bottom and the experimental HK416/6.8mm in the middle. The Germans are not giving up and even are developing more types of advanced rifles to someday crack the US market besides SF/SEAL needs...
HK still after you
five years time

M4 rifle needs to be removed
Troops ain’t lyin’
Jammin’ & misfirin’

HK G-36 could handle it
Coverin’ ME ground
XM-8 was US version
Troops wanted it, but Congress didn’t allow

HK still after you
five years time
Colt’s demise

Two brand new
Two brand new
Two brand new
HK 416 and 17
US troops beware
Stigma of foreign
adoption to been seen…

Conspiracy
HK still after you
five years time
(US won’t allow German arms superiority)
Better than anything the US has: http://www.quarry.nildram.co.uk/P1010480w.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 23

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   22
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User Comments

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Tinkerhell - November 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Nah, the U.S. still has quality arms in development independent of the Germans. Remington's ACR is awesome and there are several Blackwater mod M4s. Colt is fading somewhat, but will not disappear.
Rob Arndt - November 23, 2011 - Report this comment
TH, the ACR competition will resume and HK has 4 submissions, the same amount of total US submissions. Problem is common ammo- we have so much 5.56mm that introducing 6.5 or 6.8mm makes little sense unless you are talking SMGs. Russia went 5.45mm with the AN-94 Abakan and it has failed to replace the AK series at 7.62x39mm. We could go NATO 7.62x51mm as per our MGs, but who knows what advanced tech will lead to. Germany tried the caseless cartridge but the G-11 was a casualty of reunification costs in 1990. Rheinmetall AG has been working on a plasma weapon since 2003... and other nations propose more bullpups, polymer slug guns, small EM rail guns, flechette-firing weapons, etc...

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