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Song Parodies -> "Meaner than a Pit Bull"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Meaner than a Pit Bull"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Back in the 13th-14th centuries, the Serbian Dog was the guardian of the Serbian Empire. It was a fierce dog, a cross between a Serbian Mastiff and a Serbian wolf. Immensely strong with much stamina, fearless, loyal, willful, and obedient, the dog was used to protect Serb assests- mainly cattle and riches. The Serbian dog could take on packs of wolves or several bears at a time w/o fear and defeat them. But the dog died out over the centuries. In the 1980s a man named Nenad Gavrilovich decided to bring it back, so he crossed the Serbian Mastiff with the Serbian wolf and added Rottweiler, Pit Bull Terrier, and American Staffordshire Terrier to the mix. This produced by 1991 the SDD (Serbian Defense Dog) which can be as lovable and fierce as a pit bull but more intelligent and with an iron will. It is obedient to a fault and will attack anything its master orders. In civilian hands the SDD can make a great family guardian. But once the Serb military started to train it for attack, it became a nightmare known as the Serbian Defensive Dog. These were used in the Kosovo Crisis in the late 1990s to terrorize and kill Serb enemies of rival ethnicity. When the Serbs were defeated, their terror police units looted and continued killing until NATO forces arrived in the area. One of the first to arrive were then Germans. When they spotted the Serbs looting and torching homes, two Leo IIs fired across rough terrain. The Serbs pulled back and hid with a group of SDDs. When German soldiers crossed a bridge and entered the town the Serb police unleashed a group of SDDs towards them. They were recognized immediately as SDDs and rather than engaging them independently, an accompanying Lynx 8X8 opened fire with a MG-3, cutting the dogs to shreds at 1300 rpm!!! That's what it took to kill them. ANY SDD found by German troops was ordered killed immediately. AFAIK, no SDD can be imported into the US. It's nickname is "T-Rex Terrier!!!"
Meaner than a pit bull
Serb canine

The SDD is something new
Never frightened
Excels at fightin’

Gavrilovich made it
Cross-breeding was sound
The result was deadly
Remains fiercest attack dog around

[Takes firepower to bring one down]

Meaner than a pit bull
Serb canine
(On) flesh, it dines

Balkan use
Balkan use
Balkan use
For spreading Serb terror
Unleashed to snare
Troops of Germany
They weren’t scared

[MG brought to bear]

Killing spree
Meaner than a pit bull
Serb canine
(Illegal to import this lethal breed)
http://s3.hubimg.com/u/6219278_f520.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 25, 2013 - Report this comment
Rob - I guess that this breed is not registered with the Amerucan Kennel Club. ;D
Old Man Ribber - February 25, 2013 - Report this comment
AMERICAN! ;D
Rob Arndt - February 25, 2013 - Report this comment
It's not registered anywhere AFAIK... too dangerous. All SDD females will NOT let people near their pups even in a loving family atmosphere. Jaw pressure is much greater than a Pit Bull too and will NOT let go even if beaten with metal rods- must be shot multiple times!

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