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Song Parodies -> "Walter White's Swan Song"

Original Song Title:

"El Paso"

Original Performer:

Marty Robbins

Parody Song Title:

"Walter White's Swan Song"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

The final episode of "Breaking Bad" was entitled "Felina", which as I suspected was a reference to the Marty Robbins song "El Paso", The last line of the song goes, "One little kiss and Felina, Goodbye" ie, the narrator dies after being gently kissed by his beloved Felina, a Mexican dancing girl. In the final scene of Breaking Bad, Walt dies in a meth lab next to the thing that he finally admitted he loved the most -- the equipment that allowed him to be the king of meth. ... So let me now give you Walt's full confession in his final song
Out in New Mexican town of Alb 'Querque
I fell in love with the methedrine world
Daytime would find me in Gustavo's meth lab
I'd start a batch and ingredients would swirl
Blue as the sky was my brand, 'Phetamina
Purer than snow with a ninety six grade
Great was the take from this methedrine poison
Buried in barrels till I was betrayed

One day a former meth partner called up
Claims I had poisoned a ki-I-I-i-id
Spiteful and spurning, my cash he was burning
From blue 'Phetamina
The drug that I cooked

So in panic, I
Drove to the spot where I buried my money
Only to find that nobody was near
Wasn't aware I'd been tailed by my in-law
Phoned Nazi scum; Jesse's vengeance I feared
Just for a moment I flopped to the hard ground
Shocked when that Nazi killed Hank with his gun
This was my thought as I tormented Jesse
I had but one chance and that was to run

From my scumbag of a lawyer I heard
How to escape my past li-I-I-i-ife
Hid in a truck's tank, the air there was so dank
Inside its bowels as away I did ride

Just as fast as, I
Could from New Mexican town of Alb 'Querque
Out to a cabin in New Hampshire snow
Back in Alb 'Querque my wife does despise me
My house has been RICOed; my son wants me dead
It's been so long since I cooked the blue poison
My cancer is weaker than my love of meth

I stole a car and away I did go
Driving with millions in ca-A-A-a-ash
Maybe tomorrow the cancer will get me
This may explain why I'm acting so rash

And at last, here I
Drive to a compound outside of Alb 'Querque
I can see Nazi scum's clubhouse below
Vengeance is strong and it's driving me onward
In through the gate to those maggots I go
Off to my right I see five Nazi scumbags
Off to my left I see half dozen more
They trot in Jesse to prove he's their meth-bitch
I rush at Jesse, we fall to the floor

Something is totally whack as they hear
An M-60 spring from my tru-U-U-u-unk
Shooting and bursting, it's barrel traversing
The breadth of the clubhouse as Nazis are chumped

But my love, for
'Phetamina is strong as I wade through the corpses
Though I am bleeding, I must reach the lab
I watch as Jesse chokes pasty faced maggot
I note the fallout from my breaking bad
In midst of nowhere, 'Phetamina is spotted
Bringing back time I was Heisenberg guy
Fondling equipment that made me the kingpin
Blood-stained caress ... 'Phetamina
Good by.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   17

User Comments

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Elaine - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
Too breathtaking to score.
AFW - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
Well....I never watched "Breaking Bad"...but, I've parodied this song a few...and I'd say you've written a real winner here..
Callmelennie - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
It was easier than I thought, AFW. There's a very easy rhyming scheme in the song, so that doesn't tie you down much. So all you need is a parallel story to tell. And the story in the final three episodes of "Breaking Bad" tracks the song "El Paso" pretty well. Not surprising, as the final episode was entitled "Felina"
Callmelennie - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
And to Elaine ... As I've told AFW previously, my dad used to play "El Paso" on the Hi-Fi continuously for years when I was a little kid, so this wafted deep into my subconscious. And I was also totally enthralled by Breaking Bad. Put those two things together and you get inspiration, I guess
Jonathan - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
^ yeah if you do the meth... I mean math those two things do equal inspiration anyway like AFW I had never seen "Breaking Bad" but that didn't stop me from enjoying this parody outstanding job! 5's
Dave W. - October 04, 2013 - Report this comment
A hell of an episode and a hell of a parody to boot.....6's
WarrenB - October 05, 2013 - Report this comment
An epic tale, CML. I only watched a few of the 1st season episodes, and knew if I kept watching, I'd be hooked. So I decided to go to the Jerry Seinfeld Center for Addictive Television, and after a week or two of treatment involving old episodes of My Mother the Car, I decided there'd be another time for me to indulge the addiction. When I'm ready, it will be there.
And when the closing episode of Breaking Bad crosses my eyes, I'll come back to your parody for a better appreciation. Otherwise, tis certainly well writ.
Patrick - October 05, 2013 - Report this comment
I don't have cable, but it looks like you've told the whole story here. Now I'm caught up with what the rest of the country has been following. Thanks. A classic parody. Somewhere in my archives I have the complete series of "My Mother The Car", maybe I'll get to watch it all some day.

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