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Song Parodies -> "Hymens Are A Groom's Best Friend"

Original Song Title:

"Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend"

Original Performer:

Jane Russell and Marilyn Monroe

Parody Song Title:

"Hymens Are A Groom's Best Friend"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

Legends say when ladies wed
Their gown of white means pure
The man must wait to consummate
Only then, can he know for sure...

A bride wants soft touches
And romance that's gentle...
But, Hymens are a groom's best friend
The bride needs warm clutches,
And words sentimental
Not some anxious Ed,
Who'll rush to spread
On some hard bed..

Guys are cold,
Most choose to hold
Onto old fashioned myths they'll defend
Want to know wife's a virgin
Who ain't had that urgin'...
Hymens are a groom's best friend

Honeymoon...Niagara Falls
There may be controversy
When she is without it..

It's rude to be crude
At a time, so traumatic...
But, Hymens are a groom's best friend
He should concentrate on erot-
Not erratic
But, wants cherry splits
And all he gits..is just the pits

So, use tact
Perform the act
And If you aren't the first, just pretend
Keep "Adam 'n Eve'n"
Don't waste time believin'....
Hymens are a groom's best friend












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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   11
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User Comments

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TJC - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Tops in humor and title of the day!
John Barry - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I echo TJC.
alvin - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
my favorite of the day
Kristof Robertson - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
As TJC said, title of the day (and probably the week)...how do you come up with 'em? Wonderfully bawdy. 555
Phil Alexander - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I think he's just cherry-picking the best titles ;-)
AFW - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, TJ, John, alvin, Kristof, and Phil...
Leigh O'Sheagh - May 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Great idea and execution.
John Jenkins - May 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Clever title, clever lines, clever rhyming - particularly "Adam 'n Eve'n/believin'...."
AFW - May 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks to Leigh, and John

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