Woe is me, I found misery
At the massage parlor, where I chanced to stop
She swung good hip, really made me flip
But, when I called on Freddy, he was a flop..

So, I sadly say
There ain't no way
Freddy's not ready
For roll in hay..
He's southward bound
His head is aimed at the ground
I had to leave a lovely girl
Darned Thing Went Down...

Sounds of laughter from 'round the room
As she watched me swayin' to and fro
Could not save face for such disgrace
Turned as red as cayenne from Mexico..

And I sadly say
There ain't no way
Freddy's not ready
For roll in hay..
He's southward bound
His head is lookin at ground
I had to leave that geisha girl
Darned Thing Went Down...

She informed me, there's no rainchecks
"I give you nice bath, and good massagee, Tex
Heed advice, use Viagra twice,
And we have fun time, when you come by, next.."

So goodbye, I say
There was no way
Freddy's a "deadie"
No indoor play..
He's southward bound
His head just droopin' around
I had to leave sweet geisha girl,
Darned Thing Went Down...

I had to leave that lovely girl,
Darned Thing Went Down...