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Song Parodies -> "All Will Angles Find (in US Congress)"

Original Song Title:

"Auld Lang Syne"

Original Performer:

Guy Lombardo

Parody Song Title:

"All Will Angles Find (in US Congress)"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

This may be 45 days early, but will give new and old U.S. federal legislators time to practice before the 112th Congress is seated. CHFUDNKTOS. My lyrics should be sung by a veteran Republican to an entrenched Democrat, both fearing what the new crop intends but confident that incumbents will prevail.
Should all Bush tax cuts be forgot
And health-care opt-outs fined?
Should all small bus'ness flee or rot
And GDP decline?

Forestall the gang that climbs next year
With altered states of mind;
They'll drink the cup and spineless get,
For all will angles find.

And surely we'll see your stint stop,
And surely I'll see mine. [1]
And we'll take a pledge that taxes stet
'Fore revenues incline. [2]

We two have run the budget up
And poured the flowing wine.
We squander money and earmarks put,
Then whole shebang combine. [3]

We two have courted lobbyists
From morning sun till dine.
Unease between us frayed the cord
Thin, almost mangled twine. [4]

And here's my stand, my crusty friend,
Pray yield your stand to mine;
He'll take a right like Willie taught, [5]
As all harangues decline.
[1] Refers to term-limit legislation, eventual loss of an election, resignation or death in office.
[2] The revenue response to tax rate changes does not show immediately. Cancelling an expected increase can have the same effect as a cut.
[3] Both parties pile earmarks onto unrelated bills to "sweeten the pot" and assure passage, thus leveraging overall spending upward.
[4] I apologize for the tenuous analogy.
[5] Will BHO follow WJC's post-1994-defeat move toward the center?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Patrick - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
A good take on the fact that incumbency is the problem. After a couple weeks the new crop will be just as blighted as the old crop. We don't need term limits so much as we need the power of recall. When the misrepresentatives even suggested the Health Care bill, the public should have been able to take them out, then and there, before they could even vote on it. If this country is in trouble it's because the Congress and the President want it that way.
Old Man Ribber - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
BJM - Tough audience out there today! Anyway...cleverly said as always. I have no doubt we are under review by the death panel even as we speak (Paul Krugman even used the exact words now that O. care has passed!). ;D
John Barry - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
They go down to the D.C. rot
And feed at trough like swine
And via lobbysts, a pot
Of gold this 'hole gang finds
Dana Mathewson - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Heh! I'm having trouble focusing on the song because this brings back memories of the time I played with "the Guy Lombardo Band." Actually it was totally a pick-up band -- the Lombardo gang was all dead, but the estate sent out Art "Four-Leaf Clover" Mooney as leader, with the original arrangements, and a Buffalo, NY contractor hired the musicians. I knew the secret of sounding like Carmen Lombardo (lead sax) and Art loved our whole band. This was late 1970's or early 1980's -- when nobody had ever heard of Barack Obama, I'm happy to say. The whole economy was better then!
Barry J. Mitchel - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Patrick: Thanks; I'm optimistic that the new crop will be GM-free (not Government Modified).
OMR: Thanks; matching TOS's Gaelic was a challenge; maybe I tried too hard.
JB: Good quatrain for cynics. I hope that you're wrong.
DM: Thanks for sharing; during that time, we were led by a peanut farmer and some Hollywood Bozo. ;-)

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