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Song Parodies -> "Safe Sex"

Original Song Title:

"Rawhide (Theme)"

Original Performer:

Frankie Laine

Parody Song Title:

"Safe Sex"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

Rollin, rollin , rollin,
Rollin, rollin, rollin,
Keep those condoms rollin'
Safe Sex!

Rollin, rollin, rollin,
When your willie's swollen,
You must be controllin'
Safe Sex!

Quickies, or a slow one
STD's spare no-one
Respect that partner by your side.
If your gonna' play Tex
Do not forget the latex
Or gamble with PG on your ride..

Take 'em out, rip 'em off,
Head 'em up, line 'em up
Roll 'em on, glide 'em on
Safe Sex!
Break the pack, tear the foil,
Roll 'em right, feel the oil
Slide 'em on, ride 'em in,
Safe Sex!

When he or she's resistin'
You must keep insistin'
And pop it on the piston..
Safe Sex!

All times, you should demand 'em
"Lifestyles" "Trojans"...you brand 'em
Such a thin skin won't cramp your stride

Do not trust to Satan
And no accomodatin'
If matin'
Then, prepare for the ride
Safe Sex! Safe Sex!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
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 4   0
 0
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 5   9
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Red Ant - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
I'm not exactly sure what PG stands for though I'm pretty sure that the answer is NOT PG-rated. Hilarious. What's that joke..oh yes: Did you know condoms have serial numbers? (no) Never rolled one back that far huh? They have female condoms too though I've never seen one for sale. This should be Trojan's theme song, much funnier than what they have now. A five pack (ribbed, for her pleasure).
John Barry - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
I hear every time Frankie was lain, he used one. Fell off my saddle chuckling. Wrought fives.
Tommy Turtle - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Yes, it's very dangerous to let one's raw hide touch another's raw hide, unless, of course, you've done the second parody to the original, "Lab Test". Otherwise, before getting Rowdy, or getting near her Clint, you must encase your Beastwood.

Clever, well done, hilarious. A "threesome" of Fives.
I think PG is "pregnant", no?
John, that's the first time I've ever heard of someone having sex in the past participle, though I knew one lady who was past participating lol. (There's an old joke about an English professor and the tenses of copulative verbs.)
Michael Pacholek - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Safe parody reading: Read this one only while wearing a truss, or you'll laugh so hard you'll give yourself a hernia!
alvin rhodes - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
this has to rate right up there among the best ever on this site... i love it
Immoral Liberal - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey! I trust myself to Satan!
AFW - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, RA.....PG stands for pregnant....an old dinosaurish, midwestern conservative, Victorian, term/ from a time and place, when even uttering the word pregnant was considered being foul-mouthed. Like that Russian stand up comic used to say, "What a Country!"...I like the serial # joke.................................................................. ...Thanks, John.....clever punny joke, there.. ...........Thanks, Tommy....very funny and punny comments...yes, as I mentioned to Red Ant...PG means pregnant... ...........Thanks, Michael....Appreciate your vote and funny comment....... ...........Thanks,alvin....for such a complimentary comment...................... ...........And thanks, Im. Lib.
Kristof Robertson - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, tarnation! I sho' lurve a good Rawhide pairdy...and this was a classic. YEE-HAW! 555
AFW - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Kristof...glad to see ya' back...where ya been, to the moon?
Johnny D - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Always saddle-up & don't go bare-backing with strangers, yeee-HAW!! 555

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