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Song Parodies -> "I'm Braking My Car 'Cause You're Weaving"

Original Song Title:

"You're Breaking My Heart 'Cause You're Leaving"

Original Performer:

Frankie Laine

Parody Song Title:

"I'm Braking My Car 'Cause You're Weaving"

Parody Written by:

Old Man Ribber

The Lyrics

I heard this version of TOS on the car radio coming home from visiting my wife in the hospital (btw, shattered femur...over six months in a cast or immobilizer). As I listened, I was almost sideswiped by a young lady in a Cadillac. If that isn't material presenting itself, then my name is Kaiser Wilhelm! ;D

I'm braking my car 'cause you're weaving.
I wish that I could call a cop,
For there's no way in hell I'm believing
Of the booze you have not had a drop!
So even if you were just texting
Or strung out on drugs - it's the same.
Even if you were eating or sexting
If we wreck it will be you to blame!

Please concentrate - just watch the road -
And you won't drive - like that old Mister Toad.
So do not drive - like you came from a bar.
Until then, I'm braking my car.

(Short interude - two text lines)

So just drive and please put off the next thing
Or we'll be twisted metal and flame.

Hey wake it up - wipe off that smirk
Stay in the lanes - multi-task-ing young jerk!
'Though I don't know - who the Sam Hill you are,
'Til you're caught - I'm braking my car.

Purists and Enforcers - I used the Laine version . Others (Dean Martin, Jerry Vale, etc.) use different cuts and repeats. I also plead guilty to a gratuitous reference to The Wind In The Willows (A Motor Car!) and an archaic slang expression (Who was Sam Hill anyway?). ;D

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Wild Child JIN - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
Great Parody OMR! ;-D Many people get into traffic accidents, because of simply using their cell phones/iPads/etc.... while driving. You really grasped that concept well with this song! :-) 555! Sort of like a way to "Reach out and smash someone!" ;-D ;-)
Mark Scotti - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
Great job, OMR! Boy how real life can spout creativity. 555 prayers for your wife's speedy recovery...
AFW - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
Very good sub-title to one of my favorite old ballads...fits the snowy season well
WarrenB - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
I'm a bit of road warrior, and I see the symptoms everywhere. Well played, OMR!
John Barry - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
A lane version of the Laine version.
Christie Marie M - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
Driving along there, Ribber! Sorry to hear about your wife. I also concur with WCJ's comment. Great as always, OMR!

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