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Song Parodies -> "Carson's Vile (Like A Pedophile)"

Original Song Title:

"Never Smile At A Crocodile"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Carson's Vile (Like A Pedophile)"

Parody Written by:

Hu's On First

The Lyrics

Donald Trump hits a new low at an event in Iowa.
Carson's vile, like a pedophile
No you can't be cured when you're a pedophile
Said he stabbed his friend, I don't comprehend
How the blade broke, 'cause I think that any belt would bend

Carson's vile, like a pedophile
Bashed his mom with hammer; should've gone on trial
Just how dumb must you be? To pick him and not me?
I think I'll spit out more bile, 'cause Ben is just so vile

Iowans must all be inbred
Or have excrement in their heads
To like Carly; look at her face!
A disgrace; you're full of excrement!

And also

Carson's vile, like a pedophile
Pathological, just like a pedophile
That's right in his book, you can take a look
I don't get why he's ahead of me; are those polls cooked?

Carson's vile, like a pedophile
And just listen to his pyramid denial
Just how stupid are you? To think Ben's words are true?
With his style he will beguile you, 'cause he's just so vile

This whole country must be inbred
Or have excrement in their heads
I know more 'bout ISIS than you
(Generals too), I'd bomb their excrement

And also

Carson's vile, like a pedophile
No you can't be cured when you're a pedophile
In his book he lied, it can't be denied
He can't cover up deception though I'm sure he's tried

Carson's vile, like a pedophile
Though he's polling well, by me he is reviled
So I'm rude, so I mock. Your brains are full of rocks!
Carson smiles, but he's so vile
Just like a pedophile
"Never Smile...." is the most famous deleted song from any Disney movie. In retrospect, the decision to delete it, while allowing "What Makes The Red Man Red?" to stay in, looks especially bad.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   11

User Comments

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Barry J. Mitchel - November 16, 2015 - Report this comment
Being a Carson fan, I almost avoided this submission because of your title; I'm glad I didn't. If The Donald used a teleprompter, this parody could be on it; the language fits his style and substance very well.
Rob Arndt - November 16, 2015 - Report this comment
Carson has gone off the rails lately. His denial of working for Mannatech has just made things worse for him. Like Trump, his hardcore fans won't care, but he has a credibility gap. Rubio and Cruz may benefit in the long run... 555!
Jonathan - November 16, 2015 - Report this comment
hmm... what DOES make the red man red? 5's
Alpha Skua - July 18, 2018 - Report this comment

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