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Song Parodies -> "The Landfills of your Mind"
Original Song Title:
"The Windmills of your Mind"
Original Performer:
Sting/'Thomas Crown Affair' soundtrack
Parody Song Title:
"The Landfills of your Mind"
Parody Written by:
Lifeliver
The Lyrics
Despite its Academy Award and dreamy Michel Legrand melody, something about the pretty, well-crafted lyrics (Alan & Marilyn Bergman) of this evergreen pop standard has always irritated me. At last, my revenge.
Trying to put my finger on my irritation, I'd say it's something to do with Bob Dylan. It was he who most influentially put meaning back into the banal words of pop music in the mid-60s, often cynically spurning love and beauty for his own truths. This Tin Pan Alley couple, tired of harvest mooning and June-ing and spooning for the likes of Marvin Hamlisch, tried to do the same.
The result was a dense, cyclical epic of saccharine images too verbose for a pop song and with not enough depth to be classed as lyric poetry. They missed something else: edge. Compared with contemporary Dylan classics like 'Positively Fourth Street' and 'Ballad of a Thin Man', it was clear that something was happening but they didn't know what it was. Did you, Mr and Mrs Bergman?
Used in both the 1968 and 1999 versions of 'The Thomas Crown Affair', first by Noel Harrison (son of Rex) and the remake by Sting (son of Mrs Sumner), whose rendition I used as the OS (link here.). There are many cover versions. I recommend the great Dusty Springfield's. The Muppets did a very funny parody in the 1980s, which may also be found on YouTube. Is there anything that can't be found on the tube these days?
Trying to put my finger on my irritation, I'd say it's something to do with Bob Dylan. It was he who most influentially put meaning back into the banal words of pop music in the mid-60s, often cynically spurning love and beauty for his own truths. This Tin Pan Alley couple, tired of harvest mooning and June-ing and spooning for the likes of Marvin Hamlisch, tried to do the same.
The result was a dense, cyclical epic of saccharine images too verbose for a pop song and with not enough depth to be classed as lyric poetry. They missed something else: edge. Compared with contemporary Dylan classics like 'Positively Fourth Street' and 'Ballad of a Thin Man', it was clear that something was happening but they didn't know what it was. Did you, Mr and Mrs Bergman?
Used in both the 1968 and 1999 versions of 'The Thomas Crown Affair', first by Noel Harrison (son of Rex) and the remake by Sting (son of Mrs Sumner), whose rendition I used as the OS (link here.). There are many cover versions. I recommend the great Dusty Springfield's. The Muppets did a very funny parody in the 1980s, which may also be found on YouTube. Is there anything that can't be found on the tube these days?
THE LANDFILLS OF YOUR MIND
Like a hate rant going viral
Like an eel-infested seal
Waist extending, hairline thinning
Like yours truly's sex appeal
Like a putrid garbage mountain
Sweaty socks, hot afternoon
Like my noisy guts a-churning
'Cause I wolfed my food too soon
Like a prowling Tom that's peeping
Through your folds of curtain lace
And your privates are his apple
As his eyes invade your space
Like the creepiness you find
In the landfills of your mind
Tiny tunnel in a hollow
Through a funnel you are drawn
Eight legs follow, want to swallow
Struggle feebly, light is gone
And the nightmare keeps evolving
Horror movie's dreadful scene
Silent scream, the terror trebles
This is real not just a dream
It's a black widow that's creeping
And she's sizing up your case
Her potential mate, her apple
Hairy lusting twelve-eyed face
Like the trapdoor fangs you find
In the landfills of your mind
Scorpion tail shoots from its socket
And a brown cockroach is dead
Centipedes are scuttling quickly
You and black widow are wed
Consummation looking for:
She's now drooling to be fed
In the distance something coming
And no feeling in your hand
Something shining in the hallway
That you sense does not belong
Then you realize that it's morning
You were dreaming all along!
So at last the nightmare's over
And you're suddenly aware
Of the acrid whiff returning
Last night's curry in the air
Wafting circles as they spiral
Like a scandal's shock reveal
The harsh pungency remaining
Of last night's unfinished meal
And your sanity unwinds
Like the odors that you find
In the landfills of your mind
Nurse hangover in the hallway
But you know it won't last long
Dog's hair wipes away the traces
Of that place you don't belong
But just when thinking it was over
Comes so suddenly new scare
As you move the plate there, yearning
Is her grinning twelve-eyed stare
Like a spider vlog gone viral
Like a zeal that will not heal
Never ending or beginning
She pursues, resolve of steel
And you dread the next bedtime
And the tangled webs you find
In the landfills of your mind.
Like a hate rant going viral
Like an eel-infested seal
Waist extending, hairline thinning
Like yours truly's sex appeal
Like a putrid garbage mountain
Sweaty socks, hot afternoon
Like my noisy guts a-churning
'Cause I wolfed my food too soon
Like a prowling Tom that's peeping
Through your folds of curtain lace
And your privates are his apple
As his eyes invade your space
Like the creepiness you find
In the landfills of your mind
Tiny tunnel in a hollow
Through a funnel you are drawn
Eight legs follow, want to swallow
Struggle feebly, light is gone
And the nightmare keeps evolving
Horror movie's dreadful scene
Silent scream, the terror trebles
This is real not just a dream
It's a black widow that's creeping
And she's sizing up your case
Her potential mate, her apple
Hairy lusting twelve-eyed face
Like the trapdoor fangs you find
In the landfills of your mind
Scorpion tail shoots from its socket
And a brown cockroach is dead
Centipedes are scuttling quickly
You and black widow are wed
Consummation looking for:
She's now drooling to be fed
In the distance something coming
And no feeling in your hand
Something shining in the hallway
That you sense does not belong
Then you realize that it's morning
You were dreaming all along!
So at last the nightmare's over
And you're suddenly aware
Of the acrid whiff returning
Last night's curry in the air
Wafting circles as they spiral
Like a scandal's shock reveal
The harsh pungency remaining
Of last night's unfinished meal
And your sanity unwinds
Like the odors that you find
In the landfills of your mind
Nurse hangover in the hallway
But you know it won't last long
Dog's hair wipes away the traces
Of that place you don't belong
But just when thinking it was over
Comes so suddenly new scare
As you move the plate there, yearning
Is her grinning twelve-eyed stare
Like a spider vlog gone viral
Like a zeal that will not heal
Never ending or beginning
She pursues, resolve of steel
And you dread the next bedtime
And the tangled webs you find
In the landfills of your mind.
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User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Very, very imaginative...lots of great lines and metaphors...definitely, a nightmare from hell..with a scenario almost as scary as "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" tv reality show
Thanks for the plug and for the homage/reference!
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/littleanthonyandtheimperials0.shtml
Rather complex stream-of-unconsciousness here; quite imaginative. DKTOS, and prefer not to ;) , but as your pacing has become quite trustworthy, 555.
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/littleanthonyandtheimperials0.shtml
Rather complex stream-of-unconsciousness here; quite imaginative. DKTOS, and prefer not to ;) , but as your pacing has become quite trustworthy, 555.
The OS makes me think of having a bad dizzy spell - Good song about a bad trip.
@ AFW: thanks for positive comments. Btw, have you worked out who Dusty is yet? I know the Kardashians only by reputation and glad to know I'm almost keeping up with them, lol.
@ Peeping Tom: surprised you don't know OS. It was a difficult song to avoid in the late 60s; perhaps it's one of those 'Oh, that!' songs. Checked out your linked peeping parody but guess what? DKOS! Little Anthony was really something though.
@ 2Eagle - I know what you mean. That was the aspect the Muppets took up to great effect, I thought, simply by building the tempo. Thanks for stopping by.
@ Peeping Tom: surprised you don't know OS. It was a difficult song to avoid in the late 60s; perhaps it's one of those 'Oh, that!' songs. Checked out your linked peeping parody but guess what? DKOS! Little Anthony was really something though.
@ 2Eagle - I know what you mean. That was the aspect the Muppets took up to great effect, I thought, simply by building the tempo. Thanks for stopping by.
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