He feels the start of some constipation
And those he sprays usually regret
They never stay when he starts breaking wind
He has the smell of neglect

He meets some tarts in clubs with dancers
Bystanders never stand a chance
The sudden awe of a horrible outcome
He needs to check his pants

"I know that Rolaids help the sores of an ulcer
I know that there's drugs for symptoms of more
I think my rectum feels funny when it starts
Splats and the scent of my fart"

He may eat a pack of raisins
He may go to Lee's Arcade
But then reveal a thing in his hand
And a smell like gas grenades

"I see all the stains on my shorts getting older
I probably could make some weapons of war
I think my rectum feels funny when it starts
Splats and the scent of my fart"

Splats and the scent...
The scent of my fart...

"And if I told you that I loved prunes
You'd probably sniff for something strong
I'm not a man who has any graces
My ass won't spare me one"

"Those who reek know nothing
And find out when I'm cross
They surely curse their luck in small, closed-up spaces
Unless my urge is lost"

"I feel like my waist's holding onto a boulder
But then when I rub, I'm droppin' some more
I think my rectum feels funny when it starts
Splats and the scent of my fart"

Splats and the scent of my fart
Splats and the scent
The scent of my fart