Shit it!
This ain't Nabisco
It ain't no Country Crock tub of Butter either
This is LA! ...like that's something special.

"All I wanna do is get the runs before I die,
Says the man next to me at the bus station
It's apropos of nothing but stanky -- whew
He says his name's William but I'm sure
He's Bill or Billy or Mac or Buddy
And he's plain ugly to my high-fluting ass
And I wonder if he's ever had a day of fun in his whole life
We are drinking beer at noon on Tuesday
In a bar that faces a giant ass building
The good people of the world are washing their asses
On their lunch break, hosing and scrubbing
As best they can in skirts in suits
They drive their shiny Datsuns and Buicks
Back to the phone company, the record store too
Well, they're nothing like Billy and me, cause

All I wanna do is get the runs
I got a feeling I'm not the only one
All I wanna do is get the runs
I got a feeling I'm not the only one
All I wanna do is get the runs
And barf up and down the Santa Monica Boulevard

I like a good beer buzz early in the morning
And that loser Billy likes to peel the labels
From his bottles of Bud
He shreds them on the bar like a retard
Then he lights every match in an oversized pack
Letting each one burn down to his stupid ass thick fingers
Before blowing and cursing them out - I mean what a dumb mother fucker
And he's watching the bottles of Bud as they spin on the floor
And a happy couple enters the bar
Dangerously close to one another
The bartender looks up from his want ads

All I wanna do is get the runs
I got a feeling I'm not the only one
All I wanna do is get the runs
I got a feeling I'm not the only one
All I wanna do is get the runs
And barf up and down the Santa Monica Boulevard

Otherwise the bar is ours,
The day and the night and the big ass building too
The matches and the Buds and the clean and dirty cars
The sun and the moon but lalala uggghhh