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Song Parodies -> "Dieing Guys Are on LIFETIME"

Original Song Title:

"Pretty Fly For A White Guy"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Offspring

Parody Song Title:

"Dieing Guys Are on LIFETIME"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

LIFETIME television for physcos.
"What's on TV lately?" Nada, Nada
"What's on TV lately?" Nada, Nada
"What's on TV lately?" Nada, Nada
And all the ladies say that
Dieing guys are on LIFETIME

Disney Channel, Spike, Nothing at all's on tonight

You it makes me bored
Just to watch this crap they say
My wives a crying fool
But she watches it anyway
She grabs a tissue
But I think I see her smile
Those mood swing attacks
Have a range over a mile

So on your date, though TV's great
You know you're not going to watch it anyway
"Come on, get real" "What's your deal?"
Food Networks kay, Food Networks kay.
But if she begs, Don't even concentrate
At least you know she can't watch it all day
This world needs less crybabies
So (Hey! Hey!) Toss that thing away!!!

(Let's go watch it baby) Nuh-uh, Nuh-uh
(Let's go watch it baby) Nuh-uh, Nuh-uh
(Let's go watch it baby) Nuh-uh, Nuh-uh
"But all the couples say that
Dieing guys are on LIFETIME"

There's more than dieing dudes
There's some that beat their wives
That's what I'm going to do
If she keeps this up all night
Now snoring on the sofa, and sometime passing gas
He'll look at his wife
But she's going to kick her hubbie's ass

Just don't debate, Hide remote away
You know nothing's better than her crap any day
She made a great meal, expensive veal
But TV no way, TV no way
If you don't change, she's gonna castrate
Then you both can be on Jerry Springer's tape
The world hates sideshow freaks
So (Hey! Hey!) Let her get her way

Now they're in the living room, yeah
Yeah, He's watching Simpsons
When wife turned the TV into a torture prison
Friends cast is in it starred
But just for the paycheck
Cause in their own minds
It's the, It's the lamest sh*t

(Crying like a baby) Waa waa, Waa waa
(Crying like a baby) Waa waa, Waa waa
(Crying like a baby) Waa waa, Waa waa
Animal Planet, Nick, There ain't nothing much to pick

So choose your fate, you wanna procreate?
You know you hardly get it anyway
So if it's football fields, then cook your own meals
No soup for you! No soup for you!!!
So let her dictate, she's your soul mate
At least you know you can most the time get laid
Those wives like pushover-ease
So
Those wives do big babies
So
Let's give them more big babies

And (Hey, Hey!!!) Let her have her way!!!

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   6
 1
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 5   7
 12
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rick C - July 27, 2005 - Report this comment
TV used to be free, and good. Now it costs a fortune for garbage. 555
Meriadoc - July 27, 2005 - Report this comment
"Lifetime for Women" is in my top 10 hate list, so this one really made me laugh! :-O
Matthias - July 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Really Meir, what else is on your Top 10?
Red Ant - August 02, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABCD3) A few pacing stumbles, notably for the "At least you know you can always go on Ricky Lake" line in all three choruses, but very funny. 455.
Johnny D - August 03, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC) Hey, my wife and I love to watch The Simpsons together! Fave line: "No soup for you! No soup for you!!!" (Yes, I'm a Seinfeld fan!)
Agrimorfee - August 03, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3) A bit stumbly for me, too...a little jumbled in its ideas.
bobpiecheese - August 04, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3-D) Pacing had more than a few stumbles, but it was funny.
Kristof Robertson - August 06, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3-D) Yeah, it was quite hard to sing along to, but otherwise pretty good. Noticed it was written over a year ago; look how far you've come! 455
Rick C - August 06, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3D) - See above.
Cat - August 07, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3-D) Somewhat random in places, but in a good way. And you can rest assured that I'm not one of those soppy chicks that watches Lifetime, that's just pathetic. (although I MIGHT force you to watch the History Channel...)
Michael McVey - August 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Since you mention Jerry Springer, maybe I should put in a shameless plug for my "Balled of Jerry Springer"? Anyway, have to say you're right about the quality of TV programs, I think maybe "Poltergeist" had the right idea!!! -- MM
Stuart McArthur - August 15, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3D) the more channels you get, the more aware you become of how much garbage is out there - well done, matthias, on an OS whose difficulty level must be "pretty high for a write guy" - 555
Jeff Reuben - August 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Pacing and spelling hiccups, but not a bad song. Pretty funny.

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