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Song Parodies -> "Closer (To Clogs)"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Nine Inch Nails

Parody Song Title:

"Closer (To Clogs)"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

You let me plunge this crap out.
You left me without a doubt.
Just hand me that old U-gun.
So we can get this clog out.

Help me, just pass me that corkscrew.
Help me, I might work somewhere else.
Help me, just hand me that old plunger.
Or I'll just get it all by myself.

I wanna plunge it like a janitor.
I wanna pull out all it's insides.
I wanna plunge it like a janitor.
This whole business is flawed.
This gets me closer to clogs.

You pay me 200 bucks.
With this job that really sucks.
I wanna get it all out.
I need to get my plunger out.

Help me, I gave all my while.
Help me, this crap is packed in some where else.
Help me, I'm gonna need a name brand.
Help me get this stuff from myself.

I wanna plunge it like a janitor.
I wanna pull out all it's inside.
I wanna plunge it like a janitor.
My whole business is flawed.
This gets me closer to clogs.

Through the lead pipes.
The stenchy breeze.
I take a big puff.
Then I sneeze.
The disinfectent.
Will make it fine.
The limey scent.
Keeps me alive.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   2
 3   1
 4   7
 5   19

User Comments

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m - May 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - May 03, 2004 - Report this comment
ABC Comp--545.
Johnny D - May 03, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) I'll raise a glass of Liquid Plumber and toast to that! And them immediately pour my toast-glass's contents down the sink, of course!
Rick D - May 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Three things a plumber needs to know: Gas goes up, poop goes down, payday's on Friday.
Adagio - May 04, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but a good read for (ABC)!! - May 05, 2004 - Report this comment
"I want to plunge it like a janitor" is classic. I can hear Trent Reznor singing this. (In the bathroom - for acoustics, of course.)
Meriadoc - May 06, 2004 - Report this comment
The beat in the song fit the subject matter of the parody perfectly! :-)
Peregrin - May 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Good one Agri!
Loosekanen (The Armstrong) - May 07, 2004 - Report this comment
4,4,4. Didn't take my breath away like the subject matter would... but it was good.
MysteryGoat - May 09, 2004 - Report this comment
I really only know the original from Weird Al's "The Alternative Polka" but still you gotta love songs about plumbers.
Claude Prez - May 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Dittos on the chorus (the only part I really remember anyway). Very good job.
neminem - May 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Great idea, some problems with pacing. 4/5/5
Paul Robinson - May 16, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) STG- DKTOS on original. Don't know if you posted an audio link, I can't access Messageboard this morning - getting an error message there.

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