One, two, three, four, five
Boy, just watch those calories fly
The pounds come in truckloads of tacos
The girls say that they're porky and fat
But I really don't think so
I need something good to eat
I must eat much cause food is cheap
I like anchovies, pancakes, salmon, and pita
And as I continue the sweets get sweeter
So what can I do? I really can't order
To me eating's just like a sport
Everything's fly, it's all good let me eat it
And send in the crumpet

Chorus
A little bit of mustard all around
A little bit of eggs, sunny side down
A little bit of peaches and kiwi
A little bit of Diet Pepsi
An itty bitty sandwich in the sun
A little bit of mayo on my bun
A little bit of butter and some ham
Fry it all up and you get SPAM
Whaaa...

Jump up and down but don't shake the ground
Put your SPAM in your mouth put you can on the ground
Take one bite left and one bite right
One to the front and one to the side
Fry your ham once and butter it twice
And if you eat like this then you're alright

Chorus 2x

I'd do all to be big and fat just like you
Now I can't run, now I can't hide
Cause I got a huge behind
Combo #5