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Song Parodies -> "Things You Don't Say to Your Wife"

Original Song Title:

"Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Green Day

Parody Song Title:

"Things You Don't Say to Your Wife"

Parody Written by:

Tim Hawkins

The Lyrics

Hey honey have you gained some weight in your rear-end?
That dress you wear reminds me of my old girlfriend
And where'd you get those shoes? I think they're pretty lame
Would you stop talking 'cause I'm trying to watch the game

If you're a man who wants to live a long and happy life
These are the things you don't say to your wife

I planned a hunting trip next week on your birthday
I didn't ask you 'cause I knew it'd be OK
Go make some dinner while I watch this fishing show
I taped it over our old wedding video

If you're a man who wants to live a long and happy life
These are the things you don't say to your wife

Your cooking is OK but not like mother makes
The diamond in the ring I bought you is a fake
Your eyes look puffy dear, are you feeling ill?
Happy anniversary I bought you a treadmill

If you're a man who wants to live a long and happy life
These are the things you don't say to your wife
If your a man who doesn't want to get killed with a knife
These are the things you don't say to your wife


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   9
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User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - October 18, 2010 - Report this comment
Brilliantly funny and biting, Tim...too many fave lines to mention. My only niggle is the line "These are the things you don't say to your wife" doesn't scan with the original (I hope you have the time of your life)...maybe a better option would've been "These things you should not say to your wife". Other than that, this was fantastic. 555
Claude Prez - October 18, 2010 - Report this comment
What Kristof said. This is really good. Fave line: "Happy Anniversary I bought you a treadmill." Classic!
Mark Scotti - October 18, 2010 - Report this comment
My fave of the day!! Hialrious!!!!
w.W.w - October 18, 2010 - Report this comment
! ! !
FaNtastik snale - November 14, 2012 - Report this comment
wow man +10 respect

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