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Song Parodies -> "Use Lotion This Time"

Original Song Title:

"No Son of Mine"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Genesis

Parody Song Title:

"Use Lotion This Time"

Parody Written by:

MrMacphisto

The Lyrics

Well, it's good to be back... Here's a little ditty I modified so that it could be posted here.
Well, the key to my survival
Was greasin' up my trout
The question was how I could keep swaying
Trying to pull my weight out
But she said, "It's greasy to me"
In behind, the daily grind
And I needed a place where it could hide
Then we'd do the 6-9

I didn't think much about it
'Till the feeling made her start to whine
What I was doing in the rear everyday
Had really hurt when too tight
I used my hand to steer when tryin', when she shuddered
And I remember then
I swore that, that would be the last dry rear entry
And I'd never do that again

They say that time is a healer
And now the moon is not inflamed
I really swelled when I parted her mouth
I loved to hear what she'd say

I went to town; she'd talk dirty
Inserted in the brown eye
She said...

"Use lotion, use lotion this time
Use lotion, use lotion this time
Be careful, you're in my behind!
And use lotion, use lotion this time"

Oh these words are important
I'll never forget them
And if I ever went dry
I lived to regret it

"Use lotion, use lotion this time"
Just watch as it grows
And slip it right through
"Use lotion, use lotion this time"
When I aimed she just yelped
Oh this dame loves it too

Her brassiere had slipped off slowly
The puppies had just come out to play
What we would do dancing in between sheets
Helped me keep going all day
In and out of all her spaces
Rhythm with the deep impact
She had to turn 'round and just bend over
And I would fill in the crack

They say that time is a healer
And now the moon is not inflamed
I really swelled when I parted her mouth
I loved to hear what she'd say

I went to town; she'd talk dirty
Inserted in the brown eye
She said...

"Use lotion, use lotion this time
Use lotion, use lotion this time
So just pull out, and bear this in mind
And use lotion, use lotion this time"

Oh these words are important
I'll never forget them
And if I ever went dry
I lived to regret it

"Use lotion, use lotion this time"
Just watch as it grows
And slip it right through
"Use lotion, use lotion this time"
When I aimed she just yelped
I nearly broke it in two

"Use lotion, use lotion this time!!! OOOoohh"
"Use motion.. harder"

"Harder" [4x]

"Use lotion, use lotion this time!!!"

[song fades as more cries for lotion are heard]

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Mental Void 19 - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
Welcome back, Macphisto. Forgive me for not shaking your hand immediately, though...
alvin rhodes - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
yes...welcome back...and such an appropriate song for your re-entry
John Barry - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
How'd you slide this one in? Sliding you fives.
AFW - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
And not a dirty word in it...pretty sneaky...humor on the edge..fives
MrMacphisto - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, MV 19... Clever wording, Alvin. :) Thanks also to John and AFW. I had to exhaust what metaphors I could to make this one work...
Tommy Turtle - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
It's all Greek to me. 555
Red Ant - April 01, 2006 - Report this comment
LMAO, what a parody! Perfectly paced, rhymed (including a ton of internal rhymes - almost word-for-word in places) and formatted. One of your best MrMacphisto. My vote: There's no 1s, just 5s.
MrMacphisto - April 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Tommy. Thanks also to Red; I really enjoyed writing this one, so I truly appreciate that compliment. :)
Dee Range - April 01, 2006 - Report this comment
I'd say this was right up my alley, but you might take it the wrong way. Great stuff lol.
MrMacphisto - April 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Dee... :)
MrMacphisto - April 02, 2006 - Report this comment
I'm guessing Lurker made an attack with the ones. What a pussy.
Larry Hensley - April 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Very funny!
MrMacphisto - April 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry... :)
Peregrin - June 24, 2008 - Report this comment
I found this using the random button. !!! Holy lube job and tune up, Batman! I split my sides (and I'm glad to say that's all that got split) laughing.
MrMacphisto - June 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Peregrin :) It took me a long time to put this one together...
Jenna Talia - June 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Harder, faster, deeper... Love the lotion!
MrMacphisto - June 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Jenna... lol

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