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Song Parodies -> "Kender paradise"

Original Song Title:

"Gangsta's paradise"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Coolio

Parody Song Title:

"Kender paradise"

Parody Written by:

birdboy2000

The Lyrics

I know a lot of people liked it on FFN and kencyclopedia, so I hope people here like this dragonlance song parody about what it means to be a kender.
As I walk through the dungeon, drive my party insane
I take a look at my life and realize it's never plain
But that's just perfect for a kender like me
You know we shun boring things, like staying put you see

At 6:30 in the morning I'm taunting drow
My party says it's dangerous, get back right now
And I've been adventuring and taunting so long
That even Fizban wonders where my mind has gone


I'm a kender of adventure, jumping off cliffs to win
I've got your items in my hand, most annoying race on Krynn
And if we end the dragon's life before the party ends mine
Then yeah, we're gonna party like it's SC 39


The party dwarf killed himself with a knife
Living in a kender paradise
I borrowed the mage's spellbook, he hit me with ice
Living in a kender paradise
I told the red dragon he should be more nice
Living in a kender paradise
He breathed some fire, barely escaped with my life
Living in a kender paradise



A human rogue almost stepped on me last week
I just smiled at him, he lost his stolen goods, that freak.
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
Though when he dies, he'll go to the abyss (Worse then hell)

I befriend gully dwarves, though most think they are worthless
A kender who is mean, you know that's unheard of
I never use a longsword, only a hoopak.
And some say I'm a thief, though I'm not really like that

If you come to visit, you'll be confused to tears
We haven't had two mayors of the same race in 100 years
But we are really nice, though we give most a scare
Though most of our stories are truth-impaired.



There's no structure, no laws, and a really good bar
We don't consider fun a luxury
Like a tower of High Sorcery
As interesting as could be



The party dwarf killed himself with a knife
Living in a kender paradise
Of course, plain and boring will never suffice
Living in a kender paradise
Kender tales tell of legendary fights
Living in a kender paradise
Driving everyone insane, even the mice
Living in a kender paradise



Saving all of Krynn,
Not like Tanis's mind in the gutter
We've stopped one evil deity,
soon we'll stop another

You think we're all monsters,
but we're pure of heart
Banned by some DMs,
playing us is an art.

Trapspringer is the kender
we all want to be like
Having fun day and night,
with no fear of the afterlife

When it comes to death,
unlike others we're not whiney
And if you are a thief
we'll get third age on your hiney



The party dwarf killed himself with a knife
Living in a kender paradise
Some say we're crazy, but we're really nice
Living in a kender paradise
We've been called abominations against the gods of light
Living in a kender paradise
And you'd go insane, and accuse us of heists
Living in a kender paradise


Please note that I go by Yami-Neko Silentfoot in the dragonlance fandom, but birdboy2000 in more general places, so this song parody may be found under multiple names.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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 4   1
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 5   0
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