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Song Parodies -> "Teen Pop Merchandise"

Original Song Title:

"Gangstas Paradise"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Coolio

Parody Song Title:

"Teen Pop Merchandise"

Parody Written by:

BLO-TOWN

The Lyrics

As I walk through the stores I see idols at every step
Take a look at the watches and one with Britney Spears' is on my left
It had me laughin and gaspin so long
Until I heard a little girl say "Can I buy this mom?"
You just had to see the slogan and how they wrote it
"I'm a slave for your wrist!" now you know that's unheard of
Always got a new cd droppin, and maybe floppin
A new teenie bopper's bout to drop a rock
I really ain't a pimp but I know this hoe
She got some bling up on her wrist with some J.Lo clothes, cool
Havin little phonies tryin to turn black from white on their knees in the night
Sayin "Whoa, BLO-town's tissiiiggghhtt!"

Chorus
Been spendin most their lives buyin all the teen pop merchandise
Wear spandex all their lives if was some teen pop merchandise
Been spendin most their lives buyin all the teen pop merchandise
Wear spandex all their lives if was some teen pop merchandise
Been spendin most their lives buyin all the teen pop merchandise
Wear spandex all their lives if was some teen pop merchandise
Been spendin most their lives buyin all the teen pop merchandise
Wear spandex all their lives if was some teen pop merchandise

They always got you waiting, anticipating
Is Christina drinkin Sprite or is that Hi-C
Looks like Justin is down with the Bud team
And is that Ruben promoting some new ice cream
When I go to the pool, look out the corner o' my eye
Some girl's got a picture of Clay on her chest and one on her thigh
It made no damn sense and put me in anger
Cause I know if her panties were down he would act like he didn't see her, fool
Dude ain't nothin but the flavor of the day
He's always lookin at guys, we all know he's gay
On song 33 tryin to write 34 ya'll know that you better vote

Hook
Tell me why do we spend so much money
Buying all this crap endorsed by Britney

Chorus

Takin all my money
Money's what they're taking
Pushin on my limits
New products every hour
They've always got me lookin
Got Kelly on my Top Ramen in the kitchen
New products that they're pushin
They say they've got to earn lots of money big companies
I guess that is why they're always on my tv
Sellin pants, sellin boats, sellin junk
But I guess that's why I'm broke and out of cash fool

Chorus

Hook 2X

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   2
 2
 2
 

User Comments

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Billy Florio - July 04, 2003 - Report this comment
Funny lol
AmishJD - July 04, 2003 - Report this comment
Great idea. 4,5,4. Is that a mistake in the chorus when it goes "Wear spandex all their lives if was some teen pop merchandise." IF WAS SOME TEEN POP MERCHANDISE? That doesn't sound right, but great parody anyways.
Kazie Kid - July 05, 2003 - Report this comment
Hella, Hella funny shit right here, Man!!! LOL!!
lebeiw15 - July 05, 2003 - Report this comment
Good job on this one.
Diva - July 06, 2003 - Report this comment
LOL
St.Mark - August 27, 2018 - Report this comment
good poetic skills but you put some lines in that don't pertain to the song. so i can't give 5 stars
Galactic Gambler - August 28, 2018 - Report this comment
This is so GREAT! You hiut the mark so well. I HATE this teen pop slop rubbish and the sick commercialism of it all. Clay Aiken ain't a bad singer but he needs help from pros who care about music, that's his problem. A wasted talent. As for him being gay, that shouldn't even be an issue. Nothing wrong with that. Still, you are RIGHT ON THE MONEY in this parody. Teen pop is s***. After all, Hillary Duff got famous for her NAMESAKE, not her talent!

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