Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "(Don't Know My) Calculus"

Original Song Title:

"(I Know My) Calculus"

Original Performer:

2gether

Parody Song Title:

"(Don't Know My) Calculus"

Parody Written by:

neminem

The Lyrics

I wrote this song about a month before my Calc AP test. It does not, in fact, apply to me; I felt completely ready. But after hearing a couple of kids sing the original INCESSANTLY, I felt that it really needed a parody.
I'm losing my head,
and my vision is bleary,
last night I had a nightmare 'bout an infinite series,

So I needed a way to get away from all that,
and I turned on the radio, but it was playing this crap:

I know my calculus:
It says you plus me equal us (turn the thing off, yeah)
I know my calculus:
It says you plus me equal us (please!)
CALCULUS!

drive me crazy. DRIVE ME CRAZY!

I know my algebra, my trig identities,
You can't imagine what this test has done to me,
so don't say integrate, or differentiate,
cause with a final in the class, there ain't no way I can pass,

I don't know Rhymann sums, and not to mention,
I hate those dumb word problems in 3 dimensions!
And there's velocity, which is another reason,
I'll never get this CALCULUS!

Don't know my calculu____s:
said du/dv = uuuuuh
Don't know my calculu____s:
said du/dv = uuuuuh
CALCULUS! CALCULUS!

Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! GO STUDY!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! GO STUDY!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! GO STUDY!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

Well, I've never been good at using 'd',
and I don't give a crap about powers of 'e'.
But when it comes to calc, there's a thing or two I know,
so I think that I can testify that this song blows,

Know what ain't calculus:
I say you+me's just a rebus.

I know what ain't calculus:
I say you+me's just a rebus.
CALCULUS!

Test (plus sign) Me (equals sign) F
Test (plus sign) Me (equals sign) F

Yeah, This sure sounds just like the Backstreet Boys

Don't know my calculuhuhuhus

Don't know my calculu____s:
said du/dv = uuuuuh
Don't know my calculu____s:
said du/dv = uuuuuh
CALCULUS!

Come tohttp://free.hostdepartment.com/nobody/mine/quotes.htmlif you want to read a collection of stupid quotes I've personally heard said.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   2
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 3
 3
 
 5   12
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - October 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Wow - an integral rap that differentiates itself from all the rest.
All I can say to that is.....

e to the u d-u d-x,
e to the x d-x !
Cosine, secant, tangent, sine,
3.14159
Integral, radical, mu d-v
neminem gets three fives from me!
Meriadoc - May 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I liked this. The OS kind of jumps around, and so does this one, sort of two themes in one! Excellent! :-)
Johnny D - May 18, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Agrimorfee - May 20, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC)DKTOS, but reads well enough to get the gist of it...455 for the effort.
Peregrin - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job on a hard song, Neminem!
Jeff Reuben - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but I do know Calculus, and knowing the subject matter is an integral part of judging the song (okay, that was a stretch)
martha - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
such a clever parody!
Spaff.com - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but there is some excellent Riemann in this. (Heh heh.) My fave example is the first stanza.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/90s/2gether0.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 5025