Ensign Fred
your shirt is red
guess it means by show's end
you'll be dead

it's the color of stock characters
they keep in good supply
the ones most apt to die
kill off a stranger
to highlight the danger --
hey, red
in this plot thread
the script is often better
left unread
i said, Ensign Fred
thinking about your life's point spread --
impending dread
-- couldn't they pick Sulu or Checkov instead?

we've got Klingons off the port bow
and a malfunctioning warp drive
(oh shit)
need dilithium crystals to survive
there's no more impulse power --
and the shields won't last an hour --
hey, red
stop by the weapons shed
we're going --
to that planet
dead ahead

as you beam down to the planet
with Kirk, Spock, and McCoy
you'd rather be Kirk's cabin boy
than landing party fodder
headed to the slaughter
hey red
what's that ahead??!?
you lift your shaking phaser
and now you're dead
(we knew)