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Song Parodies -> "Santa Stole Our Toys!"

Original Song Title:

"Come On Feel The Noize"

Original Performer:

Quiet Riot

Parody Song Title:

"Santa Stole Our Toys!"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Reuben

The Lyrics

Getting into the Christmas spirit early :)
Santa stole our toys!
Sad girls and boys
We got robbed, robbed, robbed
Sob, sob, sob!

Thought that he was such a jolly guy
Slid down the chimney
To leave cool games
For lads and dames

Couldn't hurt to try a little bribe
I baked him cookies
But when he left
My dad yelled, "THEFT!"
All our stuff...was gone

Cause Santa stole our toys!
No Christmas joy
He yelled, "Take a hike"
Took my bike

Santa stole our toys
Kris Kringle's ploy
Was to sell our stash
For cash

Daddy chased him up onto the roof
Santa was ready
He ripped up dad's jaw
With Santa Claws

With the pitter-pat of reindeer hooves
He's gone already
He jumped in his sleigh
Then got away, and he yelled,
"Ho, Ho, Ho!"

Santa stole our toys
I'm so annoyed
Took our flat TV
Burnt down our tree

Santa stole our toys
Christmas destroyed
Now St. Nick's at-large
And In charge
Ride on!

(Guitar Hero solo)

Thought I'd have a new X-Box this year
With Madden football
But now I'm pissed
They were on his list

Had the nerve to take a Cabbage Patch
From my poor kid sister
I heard her cry
"Please Santa, why? Was I bad?"
"Oh Ho!"

Santa wants some more
Kids lock your doors
Or he'll come inside
Rob you blind

Santa took our games
He's got no shame
Stuffed them in his sack
That's whack!

Santa (Santa) stole it
Reindeer deployed (Deer deployed!))
They'll get major bucks!
They're gonna get doe (Ho Ho Ho!)

I hope he gets caught tonight! (Santa stole our toys)

(Santa): "What's in my sack?" (sad girls and boys)
"I got Nintendo?!

Wah, wah, wah
Wah, wah, wah

Santa stole our gifts
We're all so miffed
We got squat, squat, squat

Wah, wah, wah
Wah, wah, wah.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   21

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Phil Alexander - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Another goodie :-) I only know the Slade version of this song (which is a few choruses shorter, I guess), but it works. I could definitely hear Noddy Holder singing this, though.
Rex - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
So THAT's what the Santa section on eBay is for! Fun and funny work here.
Jack Wilson - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
I almost did one to this OS, but I thought itd seem too obvious, or I wouldve made it, so this was 58457348573845435 times better
Matthias - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Heh, heh, heh "Guitar Hero Solo"... What is with you and me making friendly characters Neo-Nazis? This is going to be one dangerous round, the Theif Santa vs. The Anti-Christ Teddy Bear.... Sounds like a good video game. In that case 555 points to you.
Arwen - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
I am SCANDALIZED! Santa? Sweet, Dear Santa? I feel like crying...

Nice work, Jeffy...lots of giggles! This was like...the BEST Christmas Song EVER! (I think I might have read that somewhere...)
Will - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
ooooooooo i thought i wacked santa
Kristof Robertson - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
I, like Phil, am more familiar with the Slade version, but I loved this, Jeff. I always knew Santa was a complete bass turd...;-) 555
Guy - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
I saw daddy choking Santa Claus
Stealing all our Christmas toys last night.

Give Santa 5 years for B&E and give yourself 5 votes.
MrMacphisto - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
LOL... good one
stuart mcarthur - November 15, 2007 - Report this comment
so lemme get this straight - you say that this Santa character, who has glowing references from children of all nationalities, decides to come into your house ......... andstealyourtoys....... is that what you're telling me? ah, you deal with him, goodcop - he makes me wanna puke...*slams door*
VERY funny stuff Jeff - TMGLTM - at least we KNOW the Fridge Penguin is morally uncorruptible - 555
Agrimorfee - November 15, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec) Love how you describe your Dad getting his jaws ripped off...and later you get even angrier when Santa steals your sister's Cabbage Patch doll. oh the humanity!!
Peter Andersson - November 16, 2007 - Report this comment
He must have drank of the Christmas spirit!
Matthias - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec) Ho! Ho! Ho-ly crap Santa's gone postal!!!
Below Average Dave ( - November 21, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec2) First he shoots up his North Pole, and after he gets out he goes on a robbing spree. . .the sequel to Weird Al's The Night Santa Went Crazy. . .no comparison, and I mean that as a sincere compliment, awesome job Jeff, one of your best, and that's saying a lot considering your collection.
bobpiecheese - November 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec 2.0) Always knew Santa was nothing but a big fat bastard. And all those elves hangin' around wold make one, well done!
Kristof Robertson - November 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec 2.4) See above...fabulously original idea + given the Reuben treatment= comedy gold.
stuart mcarthur - November 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(dec2.4) still love this Jeff - so he gives them then he steals them - what a bastard - he takes your bike, plasma TV, and other stuff, AND he burns down your tree just for good measure!! - why would he do that? - what a double bastard
Arwen - November 28, 2007 - Report this comment
Decathlon...ahhh...I love the Guitar Hero solo, and the song takes me back to my childhood! Lots of fun, Jeffy!
Jack Wilson - November 28, 2007 - Report this comment
See above!
Mikey Squirrel - November 28, 2007 - Report this comment
DEC- As a sad side note, the lead singer of Quiet Riot was found dead a couple of days ago. I don't know all the details, but this parody is a good tribute to his memory. This was very funny and well done, Jeff.
Smeg And The Heads - December 06, 2007 - Report this comment
I started reading it and the tune just popped into my head ... nice job!
Max Power - December 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Santa is ebaums of North Pole
Peter Andersson - December 14, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Taken that he'll live forever into acount I'd say 555 to life might be appropriate if he's a serial robber.
Agrimorfee - December 20, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) oops, he did it again!
Matthias - December 20, 2007 - Report this comment
-Originality: (A): Who would think of Jolly Old Saint Nick going nanners and start robbing all the houses he visits, only a mind like Jeff Reuben! -Pacing: (B): Pretty darn good, except for the part where Santa was talking about getting Nintendo. I don't know if that was supposed to pace or be an extra, if it was an extra then the pacing was perfect, if it was supposed to pace to the song then I'll have to mark a point off there. -Comedy: (A): As I said this was a brilliant idea, but you add the famous Jeff Reuben puns and the parody is just brilliant. -Overall: (A): I would have to say this was one of your best. No wonder why it took 2nd place in the Emo/Punk/Metal round.
Red Ant - December 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Very well done, Jeff! Loved the "bucks/doe" and "Santa Claws" puns as well as "With the pitter-pat of reindeer hooves".
Guy - December 23, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM-NOV) Comment and vote - see above.
Smeg And The Heads - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Comment above
Jason - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Didn't know Santa had a dark side!
stuart mcarthur - December 28, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) already extensively commented on this lovely parody Jeff - I'll just add that I was hoping/knew there'd be a Claus/Claws pun in there somewhere, and you finessed it in beautifully
bobpiecheese - December 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Below Average Dave ( - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM Already seen this one too. . .a very well polished parody.
Mikey Squirrel - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM- Commented before. Still very funny, even after Christmas.
Kristof Robertson - December 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above, twice. Nasty Santa parodies always make me smile.
Jack Wilson - December 31, 2007 - Report this comment
See above, twice!
Blaydeman - December 15, 2010 - Report this comment
(Christmas) Mommy Mommy! SANTA"S SNAPPED! Absolutely hilarious! Great pacing and so many great jokes. I hope a couple 555's will ease the pain.
Matthias - December 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Oh god! I forgot how cringe worthy your recording of this was. Great parody with great lyrics but terrible recording all because of that evil Santa voice. Damn you evil Santa!
Mark Scotti - December 16, 2010 - Report this comment
(Christmas) I guess, because of the red, Santa is a member of The Bloods....LOL
Mark Scotti - December 16, 2010 - Report this comment
I almost forgot that I used this OS also about toys:
Abbott Skelding - December 16, 2010 - Report this comment
XMAS- Never would have thought of this idea. Great work and a lot of excellent lines in here!
Ann Hammond - December 20, 2010 - Report this comment
xmas- santa claws, guitar hero solo, Now I'm he he ing 555
Below Average Dave - December 23, 2010 - Report this comment
You already know my opinion.
mike - September 18, 2012 - Report this comment

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