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Song Parodies -> "Ento... mological"

Original Song Title:

"Physical"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Olivia Newton John

Parody Song Title:

"Ento... mological"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Nazi SS bio experiments of WW2 carried out against Hitler's ban on such research...
Hitler forbid biowarfare in the Reich
Unlike the Japanese nation
Himmler disagreed but rather fight
Set up bio teams
Colorado Potato Beetle against crops
To bring Britain to its knees
Enemy food sources the goal
On which Lepinotarsa decemlineata would feed!

(Chorus)
SS wanted ento, ento
Entomological war
Himmler went too far
Bug testing at Dachau shock, hushed talk
Flies, fleas, and Mosquito stocks

Attacking people, attacking food
But no plan was enabled
Luftwaffe would not cooperate
Process Bug Bomb schemes

Mosquito viruses something new
Dr. Schilling sure agreed
Anopheles maculipenni would do
New environment could succeed!

(Chorus x3)

Forget animals
No more animals
Pigeon spies, AT dogs regrettable
Let's hear more of Ento talk
But quietly, Speer is a hawk...!!!

Hitler: "Nein! Nein! Nein!"

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Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

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Max Roach - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
The U.S. invented a countermeasure, a manual pump-spray called FLIT. When the Nazi bugs saw it coming, they skedaddled, shouting to the others, "Schnell, Heinrich, das FLIT" ("Quick, Henry, the FLIT"). Later, captured German geniuses invented the futuristic RAID. FYI.
Patrick - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
Just like Middle Eastern migrants, virues and insects respect no borders and will overwhelm their hosts. If Hitler tried to stop his cronies from experimenting with biological warfare, it was one of the few smart moves he made.
Rob Arndt - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
@MR, who do you think you are talking to? Germany through IG Farben had Zyklon B, Sarin, Soman, and Tabun. US troops in PTO were issued DDT powder, so forget Flit (Dr. Suess)!!! Postwar, the Superpowers took the German research father with VX and other secret gases. Germany in 2013 came out with powdered anthrax and shipped to the US Army. The Nazi SS bug weapons were meant for use against Britain anyway. You are not informing me of anything. In fact, the Germans were working on a desiccator gas in 1945. And they dumped 200,000 tons of poison gas in drums into the Baltic as well which have plagued fishermen since the mid-'80s. German nerve gases have been used in Iraq, Iran, Syria, and the Tokyo subway postwar. FYI, clown
Max Roach - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
(Yawn.) There is one absolutely foolproof, devastating weapon Germans like you will never invent: humor. FYI.
Rob Arndt - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
Note: German powdered anthrax was 2003, sorry for the typo. Germans bypassed laws under military R&D under defensive studies. In 2003, 13,000 German troops were deployed worldwide. 3rd largest after US and UK. US Army ordered the German powdered anthrax to study since their NBC suits would be compromised. Germans switched to new Butcher suit which is not for sale to US. Germans also using loopholes to study bio weapons for use with emerging entomopters which beat stealth platforms and stealth detection systems.
Rob Arndt - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
Oops MR, you're right. I apologize. I'm a bit more uptight than usual since I've been to the hospital twice since 10/20/15. My parodies have become a bit darker, but hey... someone requested this one on insects. I just went to my usual place to write... off the top of my head. But at least I've added a few equestrian topics ;-)
Jonathan - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
^ two hospital trips? Dear Lord man are you alright? nothing serious I hope! 455
Max Roach - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
Rob, I hope you have a speedy return to good health. First of all, your physicians are your consultants. You are in charge of your health, not they. Prescribed opioids are killing record numbers of white males your age. Physicians are not trained in nutrition. Do not let any of them say "Doctor's orders." In all seriousness, I recall that many of your food preferences are nearly as lethal as the bio weapons you mention. Processed foods are verboten, and that includes Yankee Doodles and (sob!) commercial eggnog. Take a brisk walk of substantial length every day. In several months you will find that your pants are too large. This strategy really works, even on Republicans.
Rob Arndt - November 04, 2015 - Report this comment
Thanks Jon and Max. Had LBS first time and bad reaction to substitute medication second time. I got rid of opiates three years ago and walk daily. I'm trying more organic foods but still eat my faves. Drank eggnog today. I buy maybe 16 oz a week, but it's the season. To be fair, Diet Coke aside, I like some of the Synergy line of Kombucha drinks, almond milk, organic wraps, kale salads, and eat couscous too! Just gotta remember not to skip meals and dial up too many units of insulin. Many years ago I mixed Lortabs with Klonopin and 30 units insulin for "black sleep" not knowing that cocktail could kill me. Came close to death a couple times.
Patrick - November 05, 2015 - Report this comment
You state at the beginning that Hitler was opposed to biological warfare, especially the use of insects to spread plant diseases. A wise move, since that sort of thing could come back to contaminate crops in Germany. Hitler's experience with being gassed in WWI must have had some influence on his views of such weapons. As we know, Himmler, Goering, and others had their own agendas and the ability to hide secret weapon programs of their own, without the F├╝hrer's knowledge. As for the nerve agents and rocketry programs, I never heard of a military power turning down an effective weapon just because it was first developed by an enemy.
Rob Arndt - November 05, 2015 - Report this comment
The theory on the non-use of nerve gas in 1945 was that Hitler was gassed in WW1. False. Tabun aircraft bombs made it to the Luftwaffe, but they didn't want to store or handle them. In Berlin, a barge sat on one of the rivers with 10Cm Tabun shells. Problem in Berlin was lack of field guns for that shell. Most guns were 88-128mm for PAK and FLAK. No order came to deploy so the Reds got the barge. Other gases were being developed covertly by the SS in the Schwarzwald. US captured them... As for rockets, Germany was far ahead with air and space schemes. Next rocket would have been A-9/A-10 ICBM. Upper component testing only with A-4B substituting as A-9. Another cluster rocket fell to the Soviets. Underwater launchers captured at Stettin.

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