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Song Parodies -> "I Hate AOL"

Original Song Title:

"I Love Rock and Roll"

Original Performer:

Joan Jett

Parody Song Title:

"I Hate AOL"

Parody Written by:

Chris Bodily TM

The Lyrics

I have been disconnected from AOL off and on lately. It just sucks. Also, there are a lot of good sites that I can't get on it.
["Goodbye!"]

[Dial tone plays in background]

"Hey!? What's taking so long?"

I sit here everyday by my computer machine
It's a disgrace to someone who is sixteen
The Internet goes wrong
That's why I'm writing this song

And I could tell it would be long
until I was happy

HAP-py!!

And I could tell it would be long
Before I was online

YEAH online Singin'

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

"Welcome!"

I smiled, 'cause I was online and I had some mail
"That don't matter," I said, "'cause the mail's the same" [Everyday]
I said, "The hell's with AOL?? I can't think of anything to write here!"
And next I was writing this song
God, AOL sucks, yeah, sucks!
I can't think of any more lines
To write in this song

You've got mail!

Singing:

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

["Goodbye!"]

I hate AOL

It should go to hell
I hate AOL Yeah....

I said, "The hell's with AOL?? I can't think of anything to write here!"
And next I was writing this song
God, AOL sucks, yeah, sucks!
I can't think of any more lines
To write in this song

You've got mail!

Singing:

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

I hate AOL
They should retire that dial-up Internet, Baby
I hate AOL
So give convenience and stuff to me

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.2
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 63

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   14
 16
 14
 
 2   9
 5
 5
 
 3   10
 1
 3
 
 4   9
 7
 14
 
 5   21
 34
 27
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tim Hall - December 16, 2002 - Report this comment
Very good! I agree that AOL sucks. In fact, I will be submitting a parody regarding AOL's fanatical privacy policies
?????????? - February 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Meany
Michael Pacholek - February 03, 2003 - Report this comment
I'd like to send this very funny piece to Bush, except I'm not sure that he can even spell AOL.
AmishJD - February 04, 2003 - Report this comment
good aol parody. 4,5,4
unit321 - February 17, 2003 - Report this comment
YA! bush can't even say nuclear he says nukular
c. markert - March 04, 2003 - Report this comment
The parody is true!! AOL has to be the worst on the market, free or not it sucks the big one.
I wish I was Bob Geldof - May 27, 2003 - Report this comment
I'll do a Homer Simpson on all of you. "N-U-C-L-E-A-R. It's pronounced Nukclear!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ha! Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Charlie - July 01, 2003 - Report this comment
This parody makes me proud that I have Optimum Online.
Julia - September 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Loathe and despise AOL. Has anyone tried third party ftp uploading from a Mac into an aol space? Don't. You will kill yourself.
William - October 15, 2003 - Report this comment
right now i have aol. i hate it more than just about anything else in the world. dial-up internet is possibly the worst thing ever invented.
Alphageek - January 02, 2004 - Report this comment
I agree, I can also can relate to this song, cuz im close to being 16, and you know what? he's right AOL SUCKS!!!!! IT SUCKS LIKE A MONKEY!!!!!!!!!! I wish my parents would be able to see this and get a different ISP
AMLACE@Aol.com - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Without hearing it sung - I cannot comment. The performance can make or break a parody
Mike - February 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I havent Had a Problem With Aol Whats The Deal???
Jen - February 06, 2004 - Report this comment
True, AOL sucks, and don't even try getting the 45 days free crap! They say no credit card required and then on the next screen they want your credit card, but then are like we won't bill you for 45 days then they're like, so, it's ok that we automatically take out 15 dollars from your account right? and I'm like no, u stupid piece of crap. argh... I hate aol also.
Guest - February 12, 2004 - Report this comment
I Hate AOL also. I get a 14.4 or less internet connection with Windows XP. It's not even worth having a year free of it with my new Gateway. When the year's up, im switching to MSN
Guest - May 22, 2004 - Report this comment
How come I get a cd from aol that says " 2 months Free!! " and I get a bill on my credit card for $60? I hate it too. How come it doesn't cost us to use the library but, internet costs 30 monthly?
debbie - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I hate aol because you can never leave
ex-AOL user - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
debbie, that's not true, you just have to give them seven valid reasons and cancel the credit card they charge you on.
charlie - January 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Its a great parodie. Its true AOL sucks. It has one good thing (that i like at least) that it will automatically tell you that you have mail. That is the only thing that i will miss once i switch to optimum online.
Busybody - January 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Laugh out loud (:=D)
friendsfan!!!!!!!!! - January 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Congratulations, i hope u dont mind but im gonna send this 2 my mate, hu has aol, and cannot see why i hate it so much. just look at the adverts on tv, and u no ur in for trouble - that stupid aol women treats u like ur 3, i cannot stand aol it sucks! i think the song is quite good as well (the one the dude wrote) it pretty much sums up how the majority of us feel about aol! well done!
Webmaster - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi, I have to agree 100% ! Why cant people see that aol is just using peoples computers for ther service. Why do you think it takes so long to install it! Not only does it make your computer resources slow your dial up connection will terminate on you to! Aol has major issues and I wish the goverment would shut them down! Hell, the people themselves can do it all that got to do is tell AOL to take a hike! Aol even caused me to lose one of my domain names by complianing to the registrar that I was spamming there members!NOT! I had many AOL users on that site and I would send out newsletters to them and request for updates with HTML and AOL took it as spam so they closed down my site! AOL SUCKS and Thats putting it nicely!!!
Larisa - August 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi! It is OK. I am from, Russia,bulgaria and it is.....fun
Julia - September 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Screw AOL!!!! Im going with msn. The person who made AOL should get shot in the eye !!!
Vanessa - October 08, 2005 - Report this comment
When I asked AOL to disconnect me, they blew out my modem. I had to pay HP tech support to get me squared away. The tech told me that AOL is notorious for this.
Jenefier Dyches - March 05, 2006 - Report this comment
The parody was ok, but I think it could have been better. There was not near enough hatred for AOL. I HATE AOL. WITH EVERYTHING IN ME AND EVERY LAST BREATH, THEY MAKE ME SICK. I HATE THEM LIKE I HATE WAL MART AND I HATE CHILD MOLESTERS. THEY ARE INDEED WHO I HATE THE MOST. I BET THE PERSON WHO DID INVENT AOL IS A CHILD MOLESTER.
s0l1d - still using aol ;-( - June 24, 2006 - Report this comment
I HATE AOL!!! I HATE THE STUPID BROWSER AND HOW YOU HAVE TO CONSTANTLY OPEN IT UP TO CONNECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT INTERNET EXPLORER - NOT F**KING AOL BROWSER!!! WHERE IS MY KNIFE!!!!! plus (dont forget) that you cant use aol for gaming because you cant shut down aol without shutting down your connection AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!
Jillian - July 09, 2006 - Report this comment
I have AOL. I use it to dial up and then I minimize it to the task bar and use Firefox or IE. You don't have to use the AOL Browser. I do use the email. I hate AOL because it tries to take over my computer. Like updating my connectivity services. Have no choice of saying yes or no and cannot X it off. So I just drag it to the task bar as far out of sight as I can since I don't want to update. They give you little control and I will drop them as soon as I can find another ISP , but don't know which one to use. My phone company is too slow . Earthlink doesn't have a local dialup number for my area. MSN I have also tried . So , I really don't know any good ones to use.
unidentified - September 01, 2006 - Report this comment
i work for AOL...and i hate everything over here...its all about misleading people by giving shit....NEVER SIGN UP FOR aol BECAUSE THEY COME UP WITH SHIT AND FREE TRIALS IF U TRY TO CANCEL AOL...AND THE SUPERVISORS OVER HERE ARE THE MOST LOUSY ASSHOLES U CAN EVERCOME ACROSS....THEY DON KNW JACK ABOUT COMPUTERS AND THEY KNOW HOW TO GIVE SHIT TO COSTUMERS WHEN THEY ASK FOR SUPERVISORS ON CALL.....PLEASE DONT B DUMB TO BECOME AOL COSTUMER
Lisa - September 02, 2006 - Report this comment
I agree.....did u know aol created a website that lets u see what people recently searched for on the website and gives u the users numbers?
Papalia - November 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Could've been better, but it was a good start. For a start, I think the chorus should be: "I hate AOL It's for children and it's for paedophiles (quite disturbingly) I love AOHell I wish it was still compattible" I read the aohell doc. The guy who made it got fed up with the fact hacker chat rooms got deleted but paedophile chat rooms didn't, and then when the guy asked AOL support why hackers get their chat rooms deleted but paedophiles don't, the guy had his account deleted. This in itself shows what AOL are like. I'd not be surprised if the majority of paedophiles on AOL were actually [secretly] working for them. Also, besides paedophiles, the only people I can think of who really are desperate enough to use AOL are children who know no better, but the ISP that everyone seems to talk about. I think they should switch to BT which is actually an ISP worth having. Also I heard that TalkTalk took over AOL. I hope this is true, because I hate AOL and am proud to have never touched it... even with a barge pole. The first time I looked at the AOL broadband offer, I quickly moved back to Google to look elsewhere. Hey, if I had AOHell back in the early days of AOL, I'd love to have used the cc/pw stealer to send a mass-email (which would look like an email from AOL staff) making it look like AOL were deliberately promoting paedophillia and encouraging children to join AOL just to scare everyone's parents and turn them against AOL!!!! sometimes being too young to get the pleasure of annoying the hell out of AOL sucks (seeing as aohell is no longer compattible)!! Then again, I won't be surprised if someone's already done that. It would've been such an easy way to "screw up AOL".
JonDopl - December 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Andre call me ,please ! Or my ICQ - 25634874 .Sorry for offtop ะพ:( . Regards.
cheryl barnes - July 25, 2007 - Report this comment
AOL IS THE WORST THEY ONLY WANT YOUR MONEY AND IF YOU TRY TO CANCEL THEY TRY TO GIVE YOU A DEAL OF 9.99 WHEN I PAID 25.00 FOR A YEAR . YOU CAN'T TALK TO ANYONE IN THE US AND THEY MAKE SURE THERES IS NO ONE THAT CAN CREDIT YOUR ACCOUNT SO THEY CAN KEEP YOUR MONEY I HAD THE WORST SPEED ON MY COMPUTER WORST THAN THE 9.99 I PAID FOR BEFORE AOL YOU WILL BE BETTER PAYING A DIFFERENT SERVICE . ITS NOT WORTH A DIME TO HAVE AOL. I WAS I WENT TO THIS SITE BEFORE GIVING THEM MY HARD EARNED MONEY . DON'T GET AOL THERE IS NO WAY I WILL EVER GO BACK .
A - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
I HATE AOL! IT SUCKS! I TRY TO SIGN UP AND THEY DON'T LET ME! TRY YAHOO.COM IT'S THE BEST!!!
angie - October 28, 2007 - Report this comment
i like webkinz
kt - December 14, 2015 - Report this comment
It is worse than ever now...what the h ll happened to them????

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