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Song Parodies -> "How It All Went Down"

Original Song Title:

"The Final Countdown"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Europe

Parody Song Title:

"How It All Went Down"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

In 2014, the FBI released it's previous classified information for the hunt of Adolf Hitler. 700 pages which can be found on their site. Many believe these documents and accounts prove 100% that Hitler and Eva Braun did NOT die in the bunker but escaped to S America where (depending on which source you want to believe) Hitler died either in 1964 or 1986! While much of the documents can now verify the escape plans through secret escape routes, aircraft available, shelters in Spain, Argentina, and others in S America (plus Waffen SS burial grounds in neutral nations), other parts are contradictory. The tv series "Hunting Hitler" is based on these documents and has helped verify much of the information. But the History Channel misleads the audience into believing the FBI documents prove it all true when in fact the 700 pages contain multiple theories, not one single plan! Basically, the new information states that Hitler was last seen in public on his 56th birthday April 20, 1945 and then used an underground tunnel at the bunker to connect to the subway system. From there a diversion tunnel led directly to underground Templehof air field. So far, both true. There, he took one of his sheltered Fw-200 transports on April 21, 1945 along with 7 other transport aircraft to Spain. Yes, there was a plane there and also Ju-52 and Ju-290 aircraft, but Bauer, his personal pilot was not. First red flag. Date of departure too early. Does not allow for another picture placing Hitler at the ruined Reichschancellory after April 21st, the meeting with Hanna Reitsch and von Greim on April 28/29, the wedding of April 30th and distribution of his Last Will and Testament (as taken by his secretary) by 4 messengers into May. Moving on. Once in Spain, Hitler stayed in Franco's home town in a Catholic monastery disguised as a priest and with the SS. Eyewitness testimony from the time states he was there. There is both photographic proof of German soldier burial grounds and physical proof. From there, Hitler was moved to the port of Vigo where U-boats did show up and supposedly he and Eva boarded a typical Type VIIc U-boat. In transit with another U-boat, they were at sea 66 days until they reached the shores of Patagonia. This was sometime in September 1945, long after two U-boats surrendered in Argentina in July 1945. There is another eyewitness sighting of the sub unloading passengers and material. Then off into the jungles where elaborate European type houses were located in the middle of nowhere with fresh wells dug. Verified with Nazi paraphernalia found. After this, things get sketchy. Hitler divorced Eva Braun in 1954 who had a daughter by Hitler named Ursula. They split up. Many will say this is borrowing from Braun's girlfriend who had a daughter Ursula Schneider whom Hitler enjoyed playing with and who is seen in photographs with Hitler and Eva during the war. After this, Hitler moves to Columbia by 1948 and meets with German engineers and scientists discussing the possibility of building a new rocket with a 2200 mile range capable of hitting the US and armed with a nuke! Designated DVS V-3. Of course this is impossible no matter how much stolen money and assets were offered to the Columbian government. Hitler moves again to Paraguay and eventually ends up in Brazil where he takes a black female named Cutinga as insurance that no one would believe his identity. He dies in 1984 at age 95! While this all seems too incredible to believe, there is a solid lack of evidence (physical or photographic) that Hitler and Eva died in Berlin. Marshall Zhukov and the NKVD searched for years and found no corpses nor remains. Stalin told Eisenhower that he didn't know where Hitler was and neither did British MI6. The OSS that transitioned into the CIA postwar didn't either. And Bormann never escaped with Hitler because his remains were discovered in 1972 not far from the bunker and verified by DNA in 1998. The Soviet Hitler skullcap was exposed as a fraud in 2009, not belonging to Hitler or Eva Braun and no jawbones with teeth were ever provided to verify identity by dental records (which were reconstructed from memory by ONE claimed dentist of Hitler). So the mystery endures. Efforts to exhume the body of Adolf Leipzig in Brazil so far have been unsuccessful. Hitler also went by the Spanish name Adi Lupas which is short for Adolf Wolf.
(1945, 1964, 1984...???)

Didn't die in the bunker
Escaped underground
To Templehof and a Condor
Yes, no bodies were found
He was sheltered in Spain
U-boat going down (going down)
Setting sail for another land

It's how it all went down
How it all went down

To Argentina

Oh!

New start for Hitler and Eva (Eva)
And daughter Ursula
In Patagonia were hidden (hidden)
Not a lot of loose talk, eh?
In '54 got divorced, let go
Moving on to new ground (new ground)
Had the clout and cash flow

It's how it all went down
How it all went down [2x]

No Allied showdown
No!
He wasn't to be found
How it all went down [2x]

It's how it all went down
Brazil, took a lover
Adolf Leipzig "The Old German"
In '86 he did go
Plan was brilliant, don't cha know?

Oh!
It's how it all went down
Notes: Bormann tried to leave the bunker on foot behind a German armored transport and was hit by Soviet artillery fire which killed him. Some accounts state Bormann was with Hitler and Eva to Spain which is false. Also, Blondi's remains WERE found outside the bunker. She indeed was poisoned with cyanide.These parts of the original story are true. However, the last transmission from the bunker was to Argentina! $39 Billion is Reich's assets are still missing. The U-boat to Argentina was loaded with such assets.

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Pacing: 4.9
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 15

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Jonathan - November 14, 2016 - Report this comment
455 or, put another way, Nein out of Ten! "rimshot"
Rob Arndt - November 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Sorry about the date confusion concerning 1984 and 86. I went through the FBI dates and other claimed death dates. I personally doubt Hitler made it to 1984 which would make him 95. 1986 makes him 97. Although I must confess that many die-hard Nazis died well into their 70s, 80s, and 90s!
John Lomain - November 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Fascinating. Who knows what happened. That would be amazing if any of the South America stuff was true but it's possible
Rob Arndt - November 15, 2016 - Report this comment
The Nazis had front companies in Argentina during the war and moved 30,000 people to that nation alone! Only around 2000 were legit. The Catholic Church helped the Nazis escape through "Ratlines" which was like the underground railroad for Nazis. The SS secured properties and had Nazi labor build structures in the middle of nowhere (Patagonia). German subs operated off the Argentine coast and carried Reich assets for payments even after May 8, 1945. $39 billion is still missing. Argentina received the equivalent of $1billion total. Paraguay, Chile, Columbia, and Brazil also received stolen assets to assist Nazi travel and accommodation. While not well-known, the Perons invited Nazi aeroengineers, rocket experts, and German atomic bomb specialists to Argentina. Kurt Tank of Focke-Wulf designed the Pulquii II jet fighter based on the Fw Ta 183 and proposed the 3-engine Condor II jet civil airliner. One of the Horten brothers helped design flying wings but the Nanjero ended-up as an agricultural transport carrying oranges instead of bombs! More Horten smaller civil wings were made and flown, some by famous female test pilot Hanna Reitsch who set more world records flying over the Andes. And Argentinean claimed it was developing a fusion generator called a Thermotron with the Huemel experiment on Huemel Island led by Ronald Richter. It may have been a cover for testing the Bell Device that had disappeared in the spring of '45 as it used an entire power station to operate! About 250 German scientists and engineers came legally, separate from the SS operating in Argentina and the rest of S America. Josef Mengele, the Angel of Death, lived securely there until his death in 1979. Adolf Galland, SS Commando supreme, was there too. And between 46-54 U-boats were missing, most frequently sighted offshore of Argentina (per Argentinean Navy investigation, 1947). S America also started to be plagued by UFOs after the Nazi presence. Probably more proof of disc aircraft development.
Rob Arndt - November 17, 2016 - Report this comment
Midnight on April 27th 1945 Adolf Hitler, Eva Braun, and her brother in-law SS General Hermann Fegelein slipped away from the hell of the Führerbunker through a secret tunnel in Hitler’s personal quarters in the devastated Reich Chancellory to the Berlin Underground. They were replaced by doubles chosen by Reichsleiter Martin Bormann and his close associate SS-General Heinrich “Gestapo” Müller. Hitler and his party walked through the Underground tunnels to the exit at Fehrbelliner Strasse. Waiting for them on the cleared roadway of the Hohenzollerndamm was a Ju 52 transport aircraft piloted by SS Captain Peter Baumgart of the secretive Luftwaffe Unit KG 200. The group flew to Tonder in Denmark, where the party took a second Ju U52 to the Luftwaffe base at Travemünde. Changing planes again the party boarded a long-range Ju 252 and flew to the Spanish Military base at Reus, 80 kms south of Barcelona, in Spain. General Franco supplied a further aircraft, in Spanish markings, to fly the party to Fuerteventura on the Canary Islands, where 24 hours later they boarded U 518 under the command of Oberleutnant zur See Hans Werner Offermann. A signal was sent to Berlin from the island’s base at Villa Winter, and on the instructions of Reichsleiter Bormann, Hitler’s double, Gustav Weber, and the unknown actress who had played his wife for just two days, were executed by SS General Müller. The bodies were carried out of the bunker and under Russian shellfire were incinerated in the garden. The greatest sleight of hand in History was complete. Fifty-three days later on the Argentine coast at Necochea south of Mar del Plata, General Fegelein – who had arrived three days earlier on U 880 - welcomed his Führer and sister-in law to the safety of fascist-dominated Argentina. Hitler would live there for the next 17 years, initially raising his two daughters and planning the re-birth of the worst regime in history. The couple separated in 1953, Eva sick of her lost-life in the foothills of the Andes taking the girls to live in the small town of Nequen. In the early 2000’s the women were still alive. Adolf Hitler finally died on February 13th 1962 at 3pm in the afternoon, demented, tormented and betrayed by Martin Bormann, attended only by his personal physician Dr. Otto Lehmann, and his faithful aide, former Graf Spee crewman, Heinrich Berthe. Martin Bormann, with the help of Colonel Juan Peron and his wife Evita, in the pay of the Nazis since 1941, had carried out the biggest theft in world history, transferring Billions of dollars in gold, patents, bearer bonds, shares and art works to safe havens around the world, especially in Argentina, Switzerland and Turkey. He was helped in his plan to save himself and the Fürher by senior US Intelligence officers, they receiving in turn, plundered Art and treasures, the Nazi’s huge technology advances in Rocketry, weaponry – including atomics – and technology. It was a pact with the devil that would shape the world post-1945. ~ Grey Wolf- the Escape of Adolf Hitler book backed up by the History Channel series "Hunting Hitler" using 15,000 declassified Intel documents from around the world from 1945-1960s providing photographic and eye witness proof that Hitler was spotted in Spain and Argentina post VE-DAY. Also physical evidence of Nazi structures built in the middle of the Argentine jungles that sheltered Hitler. German armaments, ammo, and Hitler's drugs all recovered. Hitler was financed by $39 billion stolen, stolen artworks, and military secrets passed on to the US via SS General Kammler. It is believed that Kammler surrendered the Bell Device to the US Army having arrived in a Ju-390 kept at Groom Lake in secret.
Forensic Scientist - November 18, 2016 - Report this comment
Monkey glands! Among the élite, injections of liquefied monkey glands were reputed to retard aging. The abdicated King of England, aka the Duke of Windsor, received monthly doses, but to no avail. The Führer, however, responded splendidly. It is theorized that his body did not reject monkey DNA. At any rate, he is alive and well at age 127, living in the Falkland Islands and operating his thriving yarmulke factory. FYI.

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