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Song Parodies -> "What Should We Do With A Drunken Driver?"

Original Song Title:

"What Shall We Do With The Drunken Sailor?"

Original Performer:

Dschinghis Khan

Parody Song Title:

"What Should We Do With A Drunken Driver?"

Parody Written by:

Dylan Baranski

The Lyrics

Again, as part of my campaign to write some more anti-drug, anti-tobacco, & anti-drunk driving parodies, here's the 3rd one I've finished today. The original song is a popular sea shanty, one you may have heard before (an instrumental version can sometimes be heard in Spongebob Squarepants). It's been done by many bands, with different combinations of verses. In fact, it's been said that there are as many verses as there are drunken sailors. Dschinghis Khan's version is one of their few English songs, & was released on their 1981 album Wir sitzen alle im selben Boot (We're everybody in the same boat). I know that some (or perhaps all) of these punishments seem cruel & unusual, but I feel that the current punishments for this & drug-related crimes aren't harsh enough & deserve tougher punishments (except excessive bail & a couple of the punishments here), depending on how bad the offense is. Anyways, just enjoy the parody.
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Maybe we should do that.

Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Kick 'em in the gut with a steel-toed boot,
Maybe we should do that.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

Tie 'em to a post & shoot 'em at dawn,
Tie 'em to a post & shoot 'em at dawn,
Tie 'em to a post & shoot 'em at dawn,
Maybe we should do that.

What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

Tie 'em to a noose & hang 'em from a branch,
Tie 'em to a noose & hang 'em from a branch,
Tie 'em to a noose & hang 'em from a branch,
Maybe we should do that.

(Hey! Hey! Hey!)

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

Parade 'em through their town with the tablet of shame,
Parade 'em through their town with the tablet of shame,
Parade 'em through their town with the tablet of shame,
Maybe we should do that.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

(instrumental break)

(police siren sound)

Cop: This is Unit 89, I have a potential drunk driver in my sight, I'm pulling him over now.

(car stops, officer gets out & knocks on window of drunk driver, window opens)

Cop: Excuse me sir, have you been drinking?

(alcoholic beverage spills out of car as window is lowering)

Cop: Well, there's no question about that then. You're under arrest. Step out of the car, please.

Driver: But, occifer, I mean

Cop: There's no excuse for drunk driving. Now please step out of the car, sir.

(end of instrumental break)

What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver,
What should we do with a drunken driver
After we arrest one?

Break all their bones with a lead pipe,
Break all their bones with a lead pipe,
Break all their bones with a lead pipe,
Maybe we should do that.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get (what they deserve),
They'll get (what they deserve),
They'll get (what they deserve)
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get (what they deserve),
They'll get (what they deserve),
They'll get (what they deserve)
After we arrest 'em.

They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve,
They'll get what they deserve
After we arrest 'em.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.1
How Funny: 3.2
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 5
 5
 
 2   2
 1
 3
 
 3   0
 1
 1
 
 4   3
 5
 3
 
 5   6
 5
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Nine Inch Niles - November 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Too much repetition Too much repetition Too much repetition Too much repetition Too much repetition.
Agrimorfee - November 30, 2006 - Report this comment
That's the way the old folk song goes Niles, that's the way the old folk song goes Niles, that's the way the old folk song goes Niles, too bad you didn't know that.
Ann Hammond - November 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Old tunes are fun.
Dylan Baranski - December 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Ha! You oughta make a parody about that, Agrimorfee! That was a good one!
peeplo - December 01, 2006 - Report this comment
If the tablet of shame is the size of a tylenol, then I'll take that punishment.
Dylan Baranski - December 04, 2006 - Report this comment
No, not that sort of tablet! I'm talking about something like the Rosetta Stone, hanging around the condemned's neck. You know what I'm saying?
Susanna Viljanen - December 04, 2006 - Report this comment
There is a filk song in the SCA known as "What Shall we Do With a Drunken Viking" - everyone gets to be anachronistically creative.
2nz - December 04, 2006 - Report this comment
Good message
Joshua Dyke - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
I loved that drunken driver song can i get a copy of it please? Joshua
Dylan Baranski - April 21, 2007 - Report this comment
What, you mean like a recording of the song? I'm sorry Joshua, but I haven't performed that yet. However, if I perform it, I'll send you an MP3 of it.
Dylan Baranski - April 21, 2007 - Report this comment
However, if you mean that you want a recording of the original song, then I can e-mail you an MP3 of that.
Dylan Baranski - April 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Actually, If you're interested, I found a website with MP3s for every Dschinghis Khan song! Go to 81.26.155.206/music/Dschinghis_Khan/ if you're interested. Also, go to www.steppenwind.com/texte.htm if you want lyrics to Dschinghis Khan songs. They have lyrics for almost all the Dschinghis Khan songs, except for most of the English songs. (NOTE: I excluded adding the http part because it would recognize the links & forbid me from posting them. Just copy these links over everything in the link bar except for the http, colon, & double slash. Chucky, please don't arrest me! I'm an honest man!)
Phoenix Force - May 15, 2018 - Report this comment
What should you do with a whining liberal what should you do with a whining liberal what should you do with a whining liberal early in the morning,TAKE THEM OUT OF THEIR SAFE PLACE(PLAYPEN)AND MAKE THEN GET A JOB
@Phoenix Farts - May 15, 2018 - Report this comment
What bug crawled up your ass this afternoon?
Phoenix Force - June 01, 2018 - Report this comment
P.F. You have been bitten by fire ants and they craw up you pants and Bite your backside Dip-Wad
Dylan Baranski - June 01, 2018 - Report this comment
To Phoenix Force: This parody was written when I was younger and may not reflect my current attitudes. Besides, it's a parody...so yeah.
Alpha Skua - July 29, 2018 - Report this comment
WHAT DO YOU DO WITH A UNHAPPY SAILOR,WHAT DO YOU DO WITH UNHAPPY SAILOR ,WHAT DO YOU DO WITH A UNHAPPY SAILOR EARLY THE MORNING,SHOW HIM SOME 3 STOOGES FILMS,SHOW HIM SOME 3 STOOGES FILMS SHOW HIM SOME THREE STOOGES FILMS EARLY IN THE MORNING.BRING ABOARD HIS GIRLFRIEND,BRING ABOARD HIS GIRL FRIEND,BRING ABOUT HIS GIRLFRIENDS EARLY IN THE MORNING

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