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Song Parodies -> "An End To "Amphibian""

Original Song Title:

"The End Of The Innocence"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don Henley

Parody Song Title:

"An End To "Amphibian""

Parody Written by:

Hu's On First

The Lyrics

Contrary to popular belief, the Newt is not a reptile, but an amphibian. And amphibians generally don't make good U. S. presidents. Especially not an amphibian who says he'll nominate the most undiplomatic man in the USA (John Bolton) as the nation's chief diplomat. Or an amphibian who's all in favor of increasing government spending as long as it's in the name of so-called "national greatness".
Remember when our land was young
And the Constitution meant something
We weren't always at war with the world
And the government didn't screw up everything

But "national greatness" often fails
'Cause we've been poisoned by these fairy tales
The politicians trim their sails
Their policies all sting

Oh, but I know a man who'll end the war
Who wants to get us out of debt
This long recession'll be no more
A new course to freedom we'll set

But it isn't Newt, now that's for sure
Newt loves greed and lies and war, so
A vote for Paul's a good defense
Let's put an end
Let's put an end, to "Amphibian"

O beautiful for spacious skies
But Newt's a guy who's threatening
He's beating plowshares into swords
So we had better not choose that "sala-man" as king

Armchair warriors often fail
Chickenhawks spreading poison fairytales
And Freddie this Newt helped to bail
On the taxpayers' own dime

Oh, but I know a man who'll end the war
And free us from this net
This long recession'll be no more
A new course to freedom we'll set

But it isn't Newt, now that's for sure
Newt loves greed and lies and war, so
A vote for Paul's a good defense
Let's put an end
Let's put an end, to "Amphibian"

Who knows who will win the race
In the caucus of the Hawkeye State
Now Paul has got a decent chance
But Mitt might kick him in the pants

A Newt win would have me real pissed
So please don't check him on that list
A warm-blood president is all
That we deserve to have

Yeah we don't want Newt, now that's for sure
Newt loves greed and lies and war, so
A vote for Paul's a good defense
Let's put an end
Let's put an end, to "Amphibian"

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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Patrick - December 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Great take on another slimy politician. As if there were any other kind. One of my favourite original songs, which was also a political protest.

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