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Song Parodies -> "Common Dandy"

Original Song Title:

"I Want Candy"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bow Wow Wow

Parody Song Title:

"Common Dandy"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

A tougher one this time that requires knowledge of British military systems and supersoldier tech. Main line... try to find out yourself. You can Google all you want, but I know this stuff by heart!
Brit supersoldier gear is tough, but geek
PECOCing, Benny Hill sweet
LM-7 gives long range fire
Too bad it's based on the old AR-10 Stoner!

Common Dandy, Common Dandy!

FRES combat vehicle to get around
Camouflage needs to be toned down
Osprey vest, lightened, little shorter
Not exactly what the Army ordered

Common Dandy, Common Dandy!

Motorcycle helmet, high tech visor
I prefer Leica that's so much better
IDZ improved over time
Brits in Dirtistan not so refined

Common Dandy, Common Dandy!
Look at this crap from the MoD!!!

None of it comes in handy...

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - March 30, 2016 - Report this comment
Note: FRES turned to SV Scout to simply Ajax.
Jonathan - March 30, 2016 - Report this comment
showoff! lol j/k reading your parodies is often a learning experience for me! 5's
Rob Arndt - March 30, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks Jon. There is a difference between an English Dandy and a French one. The main line comes from a high-ranking British General who saw the new gear and supersoldier layout and made the statement. Almost every component which includes cammo, gear, weapon, and delivery system is mismatched or not adequate. The Germans are moving towards fully integrated electronic warfare with an aerospace soldier protected by robotics, ACRs, EM armor or more exotic fluidics, self-repair, ultra-mobility with enhanced coms and vision aids, quantum computers, and exotic weaponry.
Rob Arndt - March 30, 2016 - Report this comment
Since PECOC is still evolving, it seems that no one can agree on what combo will work. Brit soldiers may have to wear the equivalent of bastardized Syrian cammo! Helmet too poses a problem. First examples were like motorcycle helmets with a single eye optic device. Newer models allow for anti-laser glasses and others for full pull down optronics. Point is, the MoD and Army have no clue what they are doing.

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