A cheerful smile is what Jay will sell
But he is a monster, he comes straight from hell
He's slimy and evil, and also extremely cruel.
If you think he's a nice guy you are such a fool.
He will get you, he'll get me too, he is pure evil he'll make us pay.
No matter what time of day, you cannot escape from him he's evil Jay.
He can be anywhere he wants, he wants you dead. He lurks in the closet and under your bed.

There's no way to escape from him
There's nowhere to run
No one can save you
from that evil Jay.

[Chorus:]
He is pure evil
He'll make you pay
You can't hide from that evil Jay.
Jay will get you, and steal your soul.
And Jay Leno is evil.
And Jay Leno is evil.


See that smile on Jay's lips?
That's not a cheery one, that's a slasher smile!
He's got such sharp teeth like a crocodile.
Those cat-like eyes, that wild hair.
One look at Jay will give you a scare.
He seems so sweet, He acts so nice.
But once you're on his show, kiss your life goodbye.

There's no way to escape from him
There's nowhere to run
No one can save you
From that evil Jay.
He is pure evil
He'll make you pay
Jay Leno is evil.
Jay will get you, and steal your soul.

And Jay Leno is evil.
He is pure evil
He'll make you pay
You can't hide from that evil Jay.
Jay will get you, and steal your soul.
Jay Leno is evil.
Jay Leno is evil.