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Song Parodies -> "Always My Precious To Me"

Original Song Title:

"Always A Woman To Me"

Original Performer:

BIlly Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Always My Precious To Me"

Parody Written by:

Syncronos

The Lyrics

Sung my Gollum, trying to explain the hold the Ring has on him
It will lead you to smile
It will dazzle your eyes
It will ruin your soul with its powerful lies
And it only reveals what it wants you to be
It's as painful as death
But its always My Precious to me

Has no need for your love
It'll take you or leave you
Has no need for the truth
Who would ever believe you?
It'll take what it wishes as if it were free
Yeah, it steals from your soul
But it's always My Precious to me

Oh-And it's only a ring
The One Ring they all wants
They's been searching long time
Oh-but I never gives up
And I never gives in
'Cause My Precious is mine

It'll promise you more
Than a bountiful season
It'll kill off your family
And laugh while they're bleedin'
It'll bring out the worst
Of the worst you can be
I'm no longer myself
But it's always My Precious to me

Oh-And it's only a ring
The One Ring they all wants
They's been searching long time
Oh-but I never gives up
And I never gives in
'Cause My Precious is mine

It takes over your mind
It is gracious and cruel
It'll do as it pleases
You're only a tool
And those lying Hobbittses can't keep it from me
And the most it will do
Is put darkness in you
But it's always My Precious to me

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
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User Comments

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Jan Unwin - December 20, 2003 - Report this comment
This is great!
Michael Pacholek - December 21, 2003 - Report this comment
Oh, by gosh, by Gollum, I'm glad I read this silly column. You are sick, Sync. Don't ever change.
Leah Lockhart - December 22, 2003 - Report this comment
LOL at the idea in iteself, but well executed too. Good job. 5's.
Arwen - January 06, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm a little bit jealous of how awesome this parody is!! I am a huge fan of Billy Joel, and we all know I write 95% of my parodies about the Rings...so searched my reserves high and low to write an LOTR parody of this very song...and I failed. You, however, have done it perfectly!! 5-5-5!!!! I love it!
Birgitta - February 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Wow-this is really good.Glad I came across this! Couldn't get better.. TC
2nz - February 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent. I just had the idea to use this song for something related to Gollum, so I thought I'd check and see if anyone beat me to it. This is excellent, man. Great job.
Phil Alexander - June 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent, preciousss... yesss it isss
Mary - July 26, 2004 - Report this comment
THAT ROCKS!!!!! You are awesome!
Glen S - February 24, 2013 - Report this comment
Still excellent. Heavy use of the OS with only minor changes in certain spots, but your perspective as Gollum and the tone still make it work excellently.

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