Mom and Dad gone for the day, no video games to play—
What to do till half past two? We all didn’t know.

Backyard pyrotechnics seemed an easy boredom fix,
So we got the matchsticks—fireworks, here we go!

Firecrackers…cherry bombs…there goes the garden (that was Mom’s)
Smoke rising to the sky, now the grass begins to fry,

Things got worse when Josephine poured a little gasoline,
Fire is spreading past the grasses, our new fence says goodbye.

Why did we start that fire?
Now the yard is burning—
Are our folks returning?!
Why did we start that fire?
Though we tried to fight it,
There’s no way to hide it

Though the smoke makes you cough, grab the hose, don’t turn it off,
Our little joke’s gone up in smoke, there goes our fun.

Fence gone, trellis gone, house is sooty, burnt lawn,
Neighbors staring, dialing 9-1-1.

Things can’t suck more, then we hear the garage door,
Then we hear our dad yell, “Where’s the backyard? What the hell!?”

When our parents see, then excuses come to be,
Mom and Dad, they are mad, trouble in the family!

“We didn’t start the fire,
Even though our backyard
Is burnt up and black-charred,
We didn’t start the fire,
I have no idea
Who it was, I fear….

...Neighbor’s son? Homeless bum? Gnomes who go when people come?
Poltergeists? Our dog Gus? All I know, it wasn’t us.

Maybe lightning struck our wall, though there was no rainfall,
Wildfires from the hillside? Maybe all the grass just died.

Gangsters, arsonists, or the other neighbor Chris,
Or a seagull, or a crow, or an airplane flying low,

Monkeys, immigrants, burglars climbing on the fence,
Even a UFO—could be aliens, I don’t know!

We didn’t start the fire,
Don’t give us the blame,
We didn’t light the flame.
We didn’t start the fire,
At least this is true:
We really don’t know who!

Could have been an accident, Heaven-sent punishment
For one of our sins—we all know that God wins.

The mailman Mr. Lanier may have pyromania…
I just know the culprit wasn’t one of your kin.

We’ll find out in no time, don’t you fret about this “crime”,
it’s OK, fire’s at bay, what else do I have to say?!

We didn’t start the fire,
And as parents you
Should be glad we’re safe too, because
we didn’t start the fire.”
But Mom seemed to be
Unconvinced by me….

Sunday morning, at ten, parents are away again
but we’re stuck here, grounded for a whole year,

On ground they found fireworks, called us stupid lying jerks,
and for being such a fool, Josephine’s in boarding school

Rest of us are locked inside, paying for that time we lied,
Planting lawn, fixing fence, scorch marks, burns, dents

Working hard with wood and saw, now we’re under martial law
Curfew: afternoon at four, I can't take it anymore!!!

Yes, we did start the fire,
But this penalty
Is just too harsh for me,
Our situation’s dire,
And though the fire is gone,
Our pain goes on, and on, and on, and on...