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Song Parodies -> "The Baby Bites"

Original Song Title:

"You May be Right"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"The Baby Bites"

Parody Written by:

Rick Cormier

The Lyrics

Friday night, she started nursin'
Saturday, sex life's uncertain
Sunday came, my luck ran out again
I was hoping for some fun
She was hurting from my son
And so I employed the weak hand, for a change

We fought, she said, "Don't use that tone!"
I sat through CSI alone
And I told myself, "A cycle, pure and plain."
"Keep on hold, the old sex drive."
And "Try not to feel deprived."
But I wonder how much more I can restrain

The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, it just may be too soon to lick, they're looking sore
Hey, it ain't right
I wanna use "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites

For nine months, at TV, I've stared
Alone in my reclining chair
She'd said, "No dirty thoughts now, for a while."
Oh, but honey, I'm a man
And I've done the best I can
But the demon boy's starting to get me riled

Last night again, she let him suckle
Bit so hard, made her knees buckle
Kid could put a pit bull dog to shame
And he leaves her black and blue
It's a sin, what gums can do
Luckily, he has no teeth or, she'd be maimed

The baby bites
He ain't just grazin'
But a bottle may make junior sick, no formula
No teeth in sight
But that don't phase him
It's been so long, she just says no
"Cause the baby bites

The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, I've got to get some poon and quick, can't wait no more
Hey, it ain't right
Why does he bruise "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites

Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites
Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 37

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   35
 35
 35
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Chuck A. Spear - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
WHOA! Nothing I could say could do this parody justice....it's PERFECT! I wrote in 10's
Adagio - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Yea...perfect! Love it, Rick, especially when you show such understanding. ;) 5's
Rick D - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Very funny and original.
John Barry - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Laughed so hard, the milk ran out my nose! 5s
Johnny D - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Awww, what a cute little nipper!
Red Ant - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Breast one I read today.
Dee Range - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Hilarious, Rick. Super high 5's
alvin rhodes - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
uniquely original concept combined with some snazzy rhyming equals fives for your sublime parody
Jeff Reuben - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
This was hilarious! "And so I employed the weak hand, for a change" -- classic.
AFW - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
You got some good licks in here...
Meriadoc - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Perfect pacing and good use of the original words. A masterpiece!
Michael Pacholek - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
You milked this one for all it's worth.
Rick C - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone! This was one of those that sat unfinished for about 2 months. Then, this morning, it just finished itself.
Stray Pooch - July 21, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody sucked - its way to all fives! You really nailed this one, which is nice considering it was the only thing getting nailed! Seriously, I can't say more than what's already been said, this one is great! 555
Tim Mayfield - July 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Good work.
Rick C - July 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Stray Pooch and Tim.
Stuart McArthur - July 24, 2005 - Report this comment
Yep, this is a great one, Rick - one of your best, which is really saying something - I notice that you also like to work an OS line seamlessly into the stream "Alone in my reclining chair" - I love that! - 555
Rick C - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Stuey Poo!
Rick D - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Rick, you might want to see this: http://amiright.com/parody/votingresults.shtml
Rick C - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey, thanks, Rick D! I didn't know Chucky kept track.
Rick D - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
There used to be a link, but there was a problem with some people getting way more votes than seemed right, so Chucky hid it.
Dominic L. - August 01, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM- 555....Good job, it had good rhyming too!
Jeff Reuben - August 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I was hoping you'd enter this one. Excellent, excellent work.
Dumb Ass Kid - August 05, 2005 - Report this comment
[SOTM] Brilliantly done. Superb parody 555
Adagio - August 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Already voted and commented. : ) 5's
Abbott Skelding - August 09, 2005 - Report this comment
[SOTM] DKTOS but a very interesting read nonetheless, 5s
Scathe - August 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Good work.
Agrimorfee - August 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Oh wow! LOL. Loved the subtle Zappa reference. 555 fer you.
Rick C - August 10, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Domenic, Jeff, DAK, Adagio, Abbott, and Scathe. Thanks Agri, didn't think anyone would catch that one. You're sharper than a poodle :-)
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - August 12, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM - I take it this is based on personal experiences and mammaries thereof? Great parody, "Kid could put a pit bull dog to shame" was my favorite line.
Rick C - August 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Peter. No, the only thing I've personally experienced here is employing the weak hand. :-)
Johnny D - August 18, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above
Red Ant - August 20, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I'll also say this is one of your breast works and that's saying a mouthful. Great work Rick.
Rick C - August 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Johnny D and Red Ant
Melhi - August 24, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Biting humor
Stuart McArthur - August 26, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) yep, still great - beautifully paced, and great syllable-matching and I loved "weak hand" for weekend - ha!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - August 26, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wish I knew the original, your parody sounds even more superb than simply being a brilliant, funny read.
Phil Alexander - August 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Bon appetit... or something like that ;-)
Arwen - August 28, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--Hi-freaking-larious, Rick...one of your best...=)
Adam Eccleshall - August 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Very funny stuff :)
Matthias - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice, Nice Baby!!! 5's!!!
bobpiecheese - July 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3-B) Luckily for you, Rick, unlike the last parody you entered in a contest that I'm also in, I could actualy understand what the hell you're talking about. A couple lines I didn't get, but I'm only 15, after all. Pacing was excellente! And, just as an aside, was the word 'poon' in the last chorus meant to be 'porn'?
Rick C - July 09, 2006 - Report this comment
No "poon" is what I meant. It is short for "poontang" which, in the US, is slang for the part of a woman's anatomy that enables them to accomplish such tasks as training a man to enjoy watching Oprah or, not to belch in public places.
Agrimorfee - July 11, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3) Nice to see this one again...forgotten how much I liked it.
Red Ant - July 16, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3B) See above, and I'd forgotten all the clever subs in this, particularly for "lunatic" in the last verse, hehe.
Rex - July 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent writing, here. You sure got your points across.
Stuart McArthur - July 17, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3-B) as I said above, one of your classic works, Rick - brilliant - did you record this one?
Johnny D - July 17, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC) What Johnny D said twice before!
tomario - July 18, 2006 - Report this comment
"I sat through CSI alone" we've all been there ! (haven't we ?)
Jeff Reuben - July 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Loved it the first time, glad to have the chance to enjoy it again!
Kristof Robertson - July 21, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC_B) Rick, straight up, you're a frikkin GENIUS writer! You make the mundane VERY funny. BRAVO! 555
Peregrin - June 21, 2008 - Report this comment
I found this by clicking on the 'random' button. A masterpiece in hiding (from me apparently) :) That was brilliant Rick :)

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