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Song Parodies -> "Still Whack-A-Mole For Me"

Original Song Title:

"Still Rock And Roll To Me"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Still Whack-A-Mole For Me"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Reuben

The Lyrics

Whack-A-Mole...the carnival game where moles pop out of holes, and you whack them before they go back down.
"What's the matter, why you sick now baby,
Didn't like that last teacup ride?
Let's head over to the arcade, Pumpkin
Maybe I can win you a prize"
On a mission to win toys for my honey
I can't win a bear, till I spend a lot of money
Everybody's riding on the roller
Coasters, but it's still Whack-A-Mole for me!

What is wrong with my reflexes, sugar?
I don't know how I got so slow
By the time I try to smack that rodent
He pops out of another hole
Lost again, I can't hide my frustration
I best get some speed, and improved coordination
Out-classed, kids laugh, even if I place last
It's still Whack-A-Mole for me!

Whoa, I grab my hammer smashing drinks so they splatter
Hit the game attendant in the spleen
He asked with a frown
"Is security around?"
It was time for me to flee the scene
Time to find a new machine

Finally outscored some punk teenagers
But this nine-year-old kid's an ace
So I walked up to him with my game hammer
And I smacked him upside his face
He bit my hand, I swung again, he was dodgin'
I kicked him in the crotch, then I whacked him in the noggin
Beat up, young pup, hope his dad don't show up
It's still Whack-A-Mole to me

What's the matter, why do I keep losing
Am I drunk or am I a klutz?
Should have driven to the toy store, bought a
Teddy bear for just twenty bucks
Blew my cash, and I shuddered from a cold chill
Hope my girl don't make mountains out of a molehill
Sweat-soaked, I'm broke, no joke, lost the stroke
No more Whack-A-Mole for me

Maybe I'll go beatin' on some groundhogs, baby
But no more Whack-A-Mole for me

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 42

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 0
 
 4   5
 1
 2
 
 5   35
 38
 38
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Brilliant! But you do need some anger management therapy....555
Stuart McArthur - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
parenting - it's all about being a mature and restrained role model - keep up the good work, Jeff ;-) - 555
Johnny D - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
But you're still gettin' fives from me!
E - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Very aggressive song, no? "I best get some speed" for chasing around a toddler!
Leo Jay - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
LOL! You had to get "mountain of a molehill" in there, didn'tcha?
Johnny D - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
You inspired me, Jeff. I will be posting "It's Still Caulkin' Holes To Me" in the near future.
Jeff Reuben - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Kristof, Stu, JD, E and Leo. And Leo, I was ready to submit this when I realized I'd gone the entire song without the molehill line. I spent the next hour trying to decide where/how to fit it in =)
Rick C - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
This is excellent, Jeff! LOL...5s
Dr. Bob - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
one of my favorite jeff reuben songs. what is this, #101? too bad the rating scale doesnt go to 6...or, better yet, to -1 ...and...about the molehill...you suck!! =)
oddybobo - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I love it. I have to say though, you are one violent bugger aren't cha?
Red Ant - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I hate this game but like this parody. 5's. PS- Saw the website. When did that come up ?
Adagio - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
CONTROL YOURSELF!! lol Delightful parody. 5's uh..."Should have driven to the toy store, bought a Teddy bear for just twenty bucks" - true, but it's the fact that her knight in shining armor went to battle with a rodent that endears him. :) ..
Arwen - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Son of a GUN this is great, Jeff!! It's a hard song to do...and you mastereed it...=) LOL!
John Barry - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Great job! 5s.
malcolm higgins - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
you hit this one on the head all right 5-5-5
AFW - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
This is wild, unique, and very entertaining...fivo's
Ashkicksass - May 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Hilarious!
Jeff Reuben - May 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you Rick, Bob, Oddy, Red Ant, Adagio, JB, Arwen, Malcolm, AFW and Ash!
Red Ant - May 03, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM-Already voted
Dumb Ass Kid - May 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS
Agrimorfee - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM)Excellent! 555
Scathe - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM)Can't let those games get to you, Jeff, or it isn't fun anymore.
Charlie Decker - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The story of my life...5s
Rick C - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) already voted, commented
Dee Range - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM.....Some minor pacing hiccups, but very funny. 455
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Never seen that game here but seen it in American movies, over here we're more into lottery type entertainment, which also in many ways explain our government... but I'm digressing. Good stuff, you're in the race.
Jeff Reuben - May 12, 2005 - Report this comment
K1...I'm also more into the lottery type games. Except when I lose, and start running around with a foam hammer whacking animals on the head to vent frustration.
Jeff Reuben - May 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Dee, you're correct about the pacing in a couple places. In those lines, I made a judgement call where if the song was sung aloud, it worked and sounded natural, and I decided that was better than changing the lyrics to match the syllables. Of course, without a recording, that match may be harder to find, especially when the reader is not me. So, I have no problem with the 4s I've gotten for pacing. And, of course, thanks for reading, and glad you liked it!
Arwen - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--Still FABulous to me!!
Guy - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Holy moley, don't know how I missed this. Billy Joel lyrics almost always make for interesting parodies. Well done.
Spaff.com - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I know it's only Whack-a-Mole but I like it!
I can't say I've ever been whacked in the spleen, but that line made me laugh - and it just got better from there. Great stuff, Jeffaroo.
Melhi - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) So You Wanna Be a Whack-a-Mole Star? :) Love this!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Whack a mole into guacamole. Hilarious concept, Jeff. 555
Rex - May 21, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Whacky!
Johnny D - May 22, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Stuart McArthur - May 25, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) see above
Billy The Goat - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Baaaaaaaaad.
Cryptic Wizard - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
HAHAHAHAHAHA I hope I gave all fives since I couldn't stop laughing long enough to see where I clicked. I though Weird Al did a good job on this song with his rare "Still Billy Joel To Me" song but this one was way better! Too bad I can't give sixes...wait , that would be 666! Never mind, I guess the fives will suffice. Awesome job.
Kristof Robertson - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I'm always a sucker for a good BJ parody (that's Billy Joel, ya perverts!)...and this is as good as they come.
Claude Prez - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
"Kicked him in the crotch, then I whacked him in the noggin"-- Great stuff. Glad you worked in the molehill line too.
Phil Alexander - May 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Lovely, Jeff - you gonna do "Still Guacamole to Me", by any chance?
MysteryGoat - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Never knew moles could make someone so violent. Great song!
2nz - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent Jeff. So, Claude favors Skee Ball and your a Whack-A-Mole guy. Maybe I should try my hand at a classic arcade parody. I lost myself, Excellent stuff Jeff, don't take any crap from security.
Tim Mayfield - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) "If I had a hammer..." wonderful stuff.
Steven Cavanagh - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Little suckers had it comin', the way they pop up all smug with that goofy grin. I swear, one of these days...
Red Ant - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-S05) Great coming back to read this one again, many great lines in here. About the pacing decision you made, it's lost on me since I don't know the song intimately-sounding "natural" (or looking "natural") is just as good as matching exact syllables in many cases.
Agrimorfee - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
see above
Matthias - December 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Holey Moley!!!
Dominic - December 03, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC- I gave it 544, good pacing. Sort of funny, didn't find it hilarious, but there were some good lines. Nice job.
Stuart McArthur - December 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(S) those second last lines are hard to get all 4 rhymes, but you did a great job, esp. "Sweat-soaked, I'm broke, no joke, lost the stroke" - funny stuff, Jeff
Rick C - December 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Still a hoot, Jeff!
Johnny D - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Larry Hensley - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Hilarious, it's what the original should have been.
Scathe - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not a game I could play.
Adam Eccleshall - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Cracked me up right from the start :)
Arwen - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--Yep, it's STILL one of my favorite songs ever. Just fabulous, Jeff!
Michael Pacholek - April 08, 2006 - Report this comment
I don't know how I missed this classic. Anything Arwen says is SOTM material has got to be great. Maybe I should pop out of my hole a little more often. Of course, here in New Jersey, "whack a mole" is what Silvio did to Adriana.
Guy - November 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Jeff - I'm borrowing some of this for a parody. Still a great read! Tribute to the awesome author will be paid in my parody.
Claude Prez - July 19, 2014 - Report this comment
Today's Classic du jour. Of the day.

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