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Song Parodies -> "Upchuck Girl"

Original Song Title:

"Uptown Girl"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Upchuck Girl"

Parody Written by:

Miss Leola

The Lyrics

Upchuck Girl
Every weekend in your upchuck world
You drown your sorrows in the booze you buy
Because you're weeping over some schmuck guy
And that is why you're an...
Upchuck Girl
Every weekend night I see you hurl
You're at the frat house and you try to dance
And soon you're hurling on your shirt and pants
While in a trance...

You have no fear mixing beer with your wi-yi-yine
Although that mix makes you sick every ti-yi-yime
Haven't you had enough? Girl, it's rough cleaning up for an...

Upchuck Girl
Did you just get dissed by that schmuck, Earl?
Cause now it seems you've made the switch to rum
I think you'd better just forget that bum
Or were you dumped by that...
Schmuck Chuck, girl?
(Who would much prefer to butt plug Earl...)
Why is it all the guys you want are gay?
At least you oughta find a guy who'll play
it either way...

And when you find him, you'll bind him and keep him prone
And when he stays and obeys, you won't be alone
And when he's on all fours, truly yours, you'll no more be an...

Upchuck Girl... no more Upchuck Girl!
(No, you'll never again be an...)
Upchuck Girl... no more Upchuck Girl!
(No, you'll never again be an...)
[repeat and fade...]

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   3
 5   12

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arwen - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
5s!! I was going to comment on "Earl," as for some reason, I'm totally opposed to that name...and guys who have it...but..."Schmuck Chuck, girl" made me laugh SO hard I forgot all about it...=) EXCELLENT!
Johnny D - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Reminds me of "Drunk Girl" on Saturday Night Live......5's
Adagio - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Really funny one..:D
Leo Jay - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I almost didn't use "Schuck Chuck" because I was afraid Chucky G might think it was a shot at him, but I had to get over it because 'Huck' and 'Buck' just weren't happenin'...
Li Oh Xhe - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Umm... I mean "schmuck Chuck"... obviously.
Ashkicksass - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Great Job Leah.

And you can try to cover up all the live long day the fact that you didn't actually mean Chucky G when you said "Shmuck Chuck." But we all know you're totally bitter about him losing the votes. I am going to tell on you right now!
John Barry - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I got a lot of upchuckles out of this. 5s.
Leah Smartass - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
You're right. I don't know while I keep trying to pretend, when... Ok, I've secretly formed a 7/28 Commission, charged with the awesome responsibility of investigating exactly what part various factors may have played in the events of that dark, dark day in parody writing history -- factors which may have included: backup system failures, website administrator sleep deprivation, and quite possibly the involvement of 'Parody Bin Forgotten', the nefarious infidel known for his violent screeds against the AmIRighteous "infidels", accusing them of continually neglecting his "brilliant" and "insightful" work...

Ok there, it's out now. No more secrecy. I want to reassure the AmIWrite community, that from here on, the Commissioners (to be announced at a press conference later today) will be committed to a thoroughly transparent process, so that we may shine as a beacon of truth, justice and virtue to other websites, like those... freaks over at places like... Whatfreaks.
Miss Leola - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Arwen: Bad experience with an 'Earl', girl? He didn't rock your world? Caught him wearing your pearls? Found out he had a thing for young girls?

Johnny D: Maybe I should send this to my homey Lorne *speedialing* Adagio: Glad you liked it!

Schizo-Shay: Yeah, like YOU wrote this... gimme a break...

Ashkicksass: Please refer to the overlong 'think I'm oh-so-funny' bit above, which I neglected to address to you by name *begging eternal forgiveness*.

John Barry: No, the overlong crap I posted immediately beneath your comment was not directed at you (refer to comment to Ashkicksass immediately preceding this on). But this comment is: "Glad you liked it." (See? Short and sweet.)
Arwen - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
If I'm not on the commission, I'm totally kicking you out of my clique. ; )
Ashkicksass - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
You really ARE so funny. And I knew it was to me. Were you thinking that I would assume it was aimed at Johnny D?
Johnny D - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
HEY! Watch it, ladies --- I'll do the "aiming" around here, thank you very much.
Schizo-J - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment

there are unconfirmed reports that certain persons known to be associates of Parody Bin Forgetten's 'I'll Getcha' organization are planning a surprise 4-5-4 attack on certain key parodies including... um.... well, this one!!!

Hold on... what's that Dick Chucky? It's happened already? DAMN THEM!

That's it, I don't care what that stupid UNeminem says, I'm launching immediate strikes on... on... um...! (them guys is RUSSIANS!) and on... um...! (them liberal panty-waists...)
Schizo-Jay - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm sorry, there's been an intelligence breakdown... it seems it was actually a '7-6-7' strike... wait... check that... oh, I see... it was a... um... hold on... oh, a 5-4-5 attack.

Clearly we need to retaliate with... a crackdown on uncivil levities...
Leah Smartass - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I'd be just sick to be kicked from the clique!
What would you do? Replace me with Rick?
Boy would that make you one cold-hearted chick
I think you'd better apologize quick!

Johnny D:
Whatfreaks! Yes... there, the 'butt-plug Earl' line can be restored to my original vision: a purer rhyme... a funnier rhyme... a raunchier rhyme...
Arwen - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment can stay...but only because you're so gosh darned clever...; )
Happy Li - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Look what you started, Miss Leola...that's a sign of a Great parody! Good job. 555 (and thank you for not doing a song about bulimia!)
Meriadoc - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I knew someone liek this back in the 70s - I think the disco thing lent itself to the 'get blindingly drunk till you spew' mentality. Or was it just that you had to be blindingly drunk to tolerate disco?
Paul Robinson - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Miss Leola-Leo Jay-Leah Smartass-Schizo J.Jay---Whew!! I concede - you are WAY more Schizo than I could ever hope or conceive of being and my tin foil hat is off to you. 5's from all of us...
Kristoffette Robertson - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Miss L, you've got such an insight into the female mind, I'd swear you were a woman! :-) 555
Schizo - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee: No -- thank YOU!

Meriadoc: Hey, pallie, disco was the shiznit! I remember boogie-ing at Studio 54 one night in the 80's, and suddenly noticing, there boogie-ing right next to me some walking steriod who'd just finished starring in 'Conan the Barbarian'...

Paul Robinson: "Miss Leola-Leo Jay-Leah Smartass-Schizo J.Jay..." ? Who are those people? Who are you? Why are you asking me these questions? Why don't you just leave me ALONE!

Kristofette Robertson: I wouldn't swear if I were a woman. (Or maybe I would...) Could you please repeat the question?
Arwen - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't know what a steriod is...let alone a walking steriod...
Schizo - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Arwen - August 06, 2004 - Report this comment you'd love me half as much if I played it straight all the time!

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