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Song Parodies -> "There'll Be No Thanksgiving"

Original Song Title:

"Do They Know It's Christmas"

Original Performer:

Band Aid

Parody Song Title:

"There'll Be No Thanksgiving"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

This year Halloween candy was on the shelves by the end of August. The commercial haunted houses opened on Labor Day. A one day holiday now stretches to two months, even as the tradition of trick-or-treating has all but disappeared in many neighborhoods. Of course, the Christmas decorations were on display by October 31 where I live. There is, or was, another holiday, an American holiday, that has been sadly neglected. What was once a day for family and friends to pause and give thanks, has become just another working, and shopping day, as many of the nation's largest retailers open their doors before the turkey can even emerge from the oven. Isn't Black Friday enough? Apparently not. This parody is based on the original 1984 version of "Do They Know It's Christmas" by Band Aid. One of the three greatest Christmas songs of the post-World War II era. (The others are "Little Drummer Boy" by the Harry Simeon Chorale and "I Believe in Father Christmas" by Greg Lake). I have not heard the remakes of DTKIC, so I can't comment on them.
Thanksgiving day, there's no time to sit and pray
From the parades and football games we must turn away
'cause in our world of commerce, we must shop until we drop
Plop our money in the till, Thanksgiving Day

Who gives a care? Who thinks of the working one?
We fight the crowd, so proud, but is this having fun?
There's a line around the corner, of parents filled with dread and fears
Kids who fail to get that new toy, are disgraced before their peers
The Salvation Army ringing "With your brothers will you share?"
We use credit cards, we have no change to spare

There will be no feast at Grandma's house Thanksgiving Day
A list of gifts we have to buy tonight
Electric gadget waits. He's lost who hesitates
There'll be no Thanksgiving Day this year

Thanks to those who gave up their holiday!
Thanks to those who won't get a raise in pay!
They'll have no Thanksgiving Day at all!

Where's the bird?
Let me eat Thanksgiving Dinner!

Greed unfurled!
There'll be no Thanksgiving Day!

Challenge hurled!
Beat your neighbor to that big screen

Boys and girls,
Twenty seven days to beg for...

String of pearls
Let him know you want for Christmas

Kauft es heute!
Morgen ist der schwarze Freitag!

¡Cómpra hoy!
Pagaremos en enero

(Repeat until exhausted, then fade into a Muzak rendition of "Jingle Bell Rock")
I don't think the lyrics on several of the web sites are properly paragraphed (or versed). I arranged them by what I think is the logical fashion, as I hear them. I've always thought that "Do They Know It's Christmas?" is a far better song than "We Are The World". I can't explain it musically, but I know it is so. Can anyone else tell me why?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Jonathan - November 26, 2014 - Report this comment
Yes! Yes! YES! Thanksgiving is indeed a very overlooked holiday! and I hate that so many people miss out on it either to work or to attend those stupid sales! my family never gets wrapped up in all that personally we prefer to just sit around give thanks watch football and stuff our faces! LOL! if you're interested I wrote a thanksgiving-themed parody around this time last year called "Please Pass The Gravy" set to Fine Young Cannibals' "She Drives Me Crazy" oh and also completely agreed about "Do They Know It's Christmas?" being better than "We Are The World" I'd explain why but I don't know if you can really go by me considering I think a large part of why I like it better is because it's a Christmas Song! anyway... I think I've gone on long enough so... here's 5's for your parody! and I'd like to wish you A Very Happy Thanksgiving!
Concerned - November 27, 2014 - Report this comment
Black Friday has indeed eclipsed both Thanksgiving and Christmas
Patrick - December 01, 2014 - Report this comment
I'm old enough to remember when the term "Black Friday" referred to the 1929 Wall Street Stock Market crash. I'm working seasonal retail, and sales were crazy on Friday, about half on Saturday, and down further on Sunday. People are going to buy what they are going to buy, either in a frenzy one day, or spaced out over the month. I miss the Thanksgiving traditions.

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